You know that national “do not call” list that was supposed to take effect in about a week? Well, two federal courts have now blocked it, agreeing with the argument of the plaintiff, the Direct Marketing Association [DMA], that the list infringes upon freedom of speech.
Who gives a shit? I say, even in this economy, and even with my staunch belief in the freedom of speech, close the mother fuckers DOWN.
Fifty million consumers have signed up already. FIFTY MILLION, and the stupid list hadn’t even gone into effect. You can bet your bippy that another several million would have jumped onto the list after it was shown to be effective. Do you hear us, DMA? Could we speak any more clearly?
Where does the DMA’s right to freedom of speech overtake my right to be left the fuck alone during dinner? I should be able, like a good citizen, to tell these scumbag jackass telemarketing companies to stop calling me and sharing my phone number with other companies. But they don’t listen. I tell them, and they call back anyway. You can’t treat them politely. When you do, they spit in your face and call you back the same week, pretending like they never spoke with you before.
So that’s how we get the “do not call” list: fifty million Americans sick and fucking tired of pleading with these dickheads to stop calling. But they don’t. They call and they call and they call.
And apparently they’re given rights an individual doesn’t have: I can get a restraining order against an individual who’s harassing me, which would make it a crime for that person to call me. No such luck with a company that wants to harass you. They can call you again, and again, and again and then share your name and number with their subsidiary who will do the same thing next week.
Why is it that I have to take extreme measures to stop telemarketers? Why do I have to PAY an additional fee to have an unlisted number, just so I can reduce the number of stoopid fucking unsolicited solicitations? Why must I resort to paying for caller ID so I can know before picking up the phone which calls are probably from someone trying to trick me into buying something I don’t want? Why must I take the phone off the hook so my family can spend time together in peace?
Why don’t those telemarketing DICKHEADS listen MY exercise of free speech when I tell them I don’t want them to call anymore? Because they’re greedy, piddling pricks who try to coerce or just plain trick people into buying something they didn’t ask for, want, or need.
I have a message for you, telemarketing companies, which I will deliver live the next time one of you calls me: FUCK the FUCK OFF, YOU FUCKING FUCKFACED FUCKTARDS. FUCK YOU VERY MUCH. DO YOU HEAR ME? FUCK YOOOOOOUUUUU.
How’s that for freedom of speech?