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Fish out of Water? Better to Dive Right In

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Are you a fish out of water?

We frequently find ourselves in situations we dislike being a part of; for instance, being with a temperamental spouse or friend, not knowing when the steam is going to blow off; or having to perform a boring task.

How do we deal with such repetitive phenomena?

Most of us rush into employing superficial techniques that seemingly get us out of the situation quickly, but do not guarantee a no-brainer remedy when the situation springs up again. By superficial, I mean, we tend to solve or resolve things at their surface level. We might cook up an excuse to get out of a boring task once. Next time around, nothing changes. We have chosen not to look at the fundamental aspect of our discomfort. Many times, we do not even understand the reasoning behind our discomfort and dislikes – it’s a doing of our conscious (logical) mind, which is the surface.

If we seek clarity on what drives our likes and dislikes, we are better equipped to deal with them. It does not mean that we are supposed to turn our dislikes into likes. It also does not mean that we need to force ourselves into finding comfort in discomfort. But seeking fundamental self-clarity certainly is a slow-but-sure approach towards minimizing and eventually eliminating the “suffering” part of these adverse situations. As someone said, “Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional.”

Why do we choose not to hunt for the root cause of our dislikes? Is it because we are afraid it’s too much hard work, or is it because of fear of embarrassment as the hunting may actually involve seeking opinions and feedback from people close to us? I like and advocate the philosophical angle behind homeopathy, because of this very reason – getting down to the grass-roots level and fixing it right there. It pays to find how deep the water is, by entering into it – once and for all. Having done that, we’ll realize that several situations that seem like discrete challenges are just manifestations of a handful of fundamental characteristics we possess.

This clarity will allow us to accept and embrace the inevitability of the situations. And thus it shall ease the pain and allow us to deal with it wisely. We need not hide behind our conscious masks, at least with ourselves. Fearless and sincere communication with our subconscious will see us through in the most adverse situations.

So, when’s a good time to do this? Right now! Before we get into the next traffic jam, I think we owe ourselves at least one cleansing exercise. Aren’t we tired of our whining, crying, cursing, passing-the-buck, avoiding, making excuses, and various other unsuccessful ways of feeling better, when we are out of water?

There’s some food (and water!) for thought.

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About Vishal Mehta