I’m on this roller coaster ride, trying not to be flung out! I have moved to another town and am currently trying to start from scratch as a self-employed psychotherapist. Now I suddenly doubt that any good will come of this… and shouldn’t I rather paint or travel to India and be a psychic healer?
Apart from that, anybody giving me advice stands a good chance of being barked at by me – even if I was the one that asked them for help! I am usually outspoken, but this tendency to explode is new to me.
I have a lover and friends, and I mean to keep them. Can you give me any advice?
Greetings From a Sad Volcano
Yeah! You’re a danger, all right. Let me fill you in on the astrology.
As you know, people are walking around with their various complexes. In your business, you’re aware that some events can occur which trigger the complex and all hell breaks loose. Same thing in my business, except timing is foreseeable because it correlates with transits to the birth chart.
Now in your chart there is a big fat honkin’ complex. It’s composed of Mars (anger), your Moon (emotion), Uranus (unpredictable) and Pluto (explosive). Further, all those planets are conjunct your ascendant, which means we can all see the veins pop out on your forehead.
This whole mess is in Virgo, Mercury’s sign (communication), which is why you yell like a drill sergeant, I bet. There it sits and then along comes a transit, in this case from Uranus. The effect is like putting a cattle prod to this thing, and the result is your email!
Here’s what I can offer. First the timing. Forget about quick resolution. You will be dealing with this in your face into early 2008. It's not going away, so you need to align. You can do that if you understand the underlying purpose, which is your liberation.
Now Uranus wants to experiment. Out with the old, in with the new – and then out with the new and in with the newer new. See what you’ve done? You’ve moved home on impulse. Now you have another impulse. As disruptive as this may be, it has a purpose.
Think about it. Do people necessarily know what they want? They don’t. Sometimes they have to experiment. They have to try different hats different ways and this is where you’re at now, due to arrive circa 2008. But with all this Virgo, you want to be perfect! You want order! But you’re not going to get it. You’re going to get the cattle prod. And as soon as you try to settle, here comes another impulse.
The fact is, you don’t want anyone telling you what to do. You don’t want restriction of any kind! You want to figure it out yourself. You will be able to reduce your suffering dramatically if you get complexly conscious of this and embrace, even celebrate, this process.
This transit is releasing all this energy, but over these next months you will learn, via experimentation, all about this weapon you have. You will learn about the knife that you are. With a little bit of luck, you will become a brilliant (Uranus) psychotherapist (Pluto) who helps (Virgo) heal (Pluto) the emotionally (Moon) injured (Mars). And it will all be worth it.
But you asked about keeping your friends and your lover, and I think you’re already doing quite a bit. You’re aware you're packing an enormous punch and looking for appropriate ways to discharge. You can also communicate; this is Virgo’s forte. Explain that you need a lot space right now. You need a lot of freedom, but this does not mean you don’t love them.
Outside of that, I would look for some bulletproof friends — people who can take your heat, because your heat is hot. And you are very Virgo, so you don’t want to hurt people. You want to help them. This is why you feel sad. You know people are blown off the planet by you, so it would be nice to have some thick-skinned friends, some "hard to kill" people.
Indiana Jones comes to mind. You come at him with your rage, he’ll just shoot you and go on with his day! In fact, that wouldn’t be a bad idea. Arm your friends with (squirt) guns and tell them to shoot you if you’re too far over the line.