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DVD Review: Vampires Suck

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If you have a teen or tween in your house, chances are they’re gaga over the movie Twilight. Vampires Suck is a parody of the first two popular teen vampire/werewolf movies and was released on Blu-ray and DVD on November 30 by Fox Entertainment.

Vampires Suck is directed by Jason Friedburg and Aaron Seltzer and stars Ken Jeong, Matt Lanter, and Anneliese van der Pol. Friedburg and Seltzer have also directed Meet the Spartans and Disaster Movie and are known for their spoofs on popular movies.

Teen heroine, Becca, moves to Sporks, Washington to live with her Dad (get it… Sporks?). Starting high school she is drawn toward the pasty white, Edward Sullen (Lanter). Of course, there is also handsome Jacob with a tendency to chase cats who falls in love with Becca too. Becca has to save her love from a trio of evil vampires called the Lords of Zolturi.

Vampires Suck pretty much follows the story line of Twilight with the addition of really stupid jokes and references. The movie is loaded with pop culture influences including Jersey Shore, the Kardashians, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Tiger Woods.

The movie is definitely filled with sexual inuendos including Becca’s Dad’s affair with a blow up doll. There’s lots of teen lust, bare chests and a fair amount of questionable language. There’s also a gay video of “It’s Raining Men” with the werewolf pack bare chested.

If you liked the Twilight movies, you’ll probably enjoy Vampires Suck. My 17yo daughter thought it was hysterical and is up to watching it four times now. If you have someone in the younger crowd who’s a Twilight fan, you might want to think twice about letting them watch it. I’m really not sure I agree with the PG-13 rating although I’m not sure it’s an R either. There’s a bunch of sexually suggestive things in there that I don’t necessarily want my 13yo watching.

As a parody goes, Vampires Suck is less stupid than Meet the Spartans and Disaster Movie but believe me it’s still stupid enough to be enjoyed by anyone who is a fan of Friedburg & Seltzer.

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About Ellen Christian

Ellen is a busy mom of two teenagers who left the corporate world in 2008 to focus on a more eco-friendly life. She lives in rural Vermont where she juggles family, two blogs and a career in social media. You can find her at http://www.confessionsofanover-workedmom.com/ and http://the-socialites-closet.blogspot.com/.