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DVD Review: Albino Farm

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How can anyone who loves horror flicks resist one titled Albino Farm? Knowing that a “creature designer” worked on the film is even more incentive to get the popcorn popping and reserve a seat in front of the screen.

Four attractive students–two young women and two young men–are on a three-day excursion to study rural cultural history. Their first interesting find is a “kid” scraping roadkill off the middle of the road. They get a “flat in the middle of bumf*** without a spare” and—guess what—no bars (not the kind that serve alcoholic beverages, the cell phone kind). Their next encounter is with a blind character sitting outside a service station, spouting some weird stuff about the past, legends, and Leviticus.

The students buy a tire from this philosopher, and decide to explore the legend. No cell phone bars and a strange legend? Uh-uh, just hit the highway, kids, this neighborhood is not for you. Next stop: revival tent (where Stacey [responsible girl] and Sanjay [ brainy guy] wait in the car while Brian [wise-ass guy] and Melody [up-for-fun gal] find another strange character lurking about, who alludes to the albino farm “but the truth is…there were all kinds kept up there.”).

Each person they meet as they work their way to the horror that awaits them is somehow physically handicapped or deformed.  The residents of Shiloh, the Ozarks town where the action takes place, are all infected with some aggressive form of ignorance.

There are no Oscar-worthy performances in Albino Farm but the actors are capable and convey fear, anxiety, and terror convincingly; they are likable and believable.  Most of the creatures that live on or haunt the property that is known as Albino Farm are mutants from the neck up, although that does not detract from their creepiness.  Interestingly, the only albino we see in the movie is not on the farm.

Once the violence begins, writer/directors Joe Anderson and Sean McEwen hold nothing back. Much of the action occurs at night, which only increases the creepiness (and possibly hides budget deficiencies). Horribly mutated people stalk Stacey (Tammin Sursok) and Sanjay (Sunkrish Bala), torture Brian (Nick Richey), and generally annoy Melody (Alicia Lagano) who lost her sense of humor on the way to the “farm.” The audience willingly plays along with “who will die, who won’t,” all the while pretty much convinced the kids are going to be staying down on the farm.

Albino Farm is a catalogue of horror film clichés—lost on back roads, flat tire, no cell phone service, strange people, mutants, night, chained gates, startle moments, condemned sign—but combined with a workable script and good technical values, it is entertaining and scary. The audience is lulled into submission with comfortable, familiar elements and then put on high alert once the “fun” begins.

Extra features with Albino Farm are a filmmakers’ commentary, behind-the-scenes video, cast and crew bios, and trailers. Did you know there is a film genre known as “Redneck Slasher”? Albino Farm is a fine example.

Bottom Line: Would I buy/rent/stream Albino Farm? Rent—I don’t want to see it more than a few times, but it’s worth the rental.

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About Miss Bob Etier

  • Ronnie Smalls

    Love this film. Great example of “hillbilly horror” genre. And the creatures are quite cool.