So to answer "Whither Hot Corner Power," the Cardinals acquired third baseman/outfielder/magician-for-hire Mark DeRosa from the Cleveland Indians. In return, the Cards gave up power righty reliever Chris Perez and a (supposedly) valuable player to be named later. At the time of trade, DeRosa had 50 RBIs on a team that didn't score a bunch of runs to begin with. Given the glut of relievers on the team, this was a great trade for both clubs. It'll be nice to have a stable presence at third base rather than a rotating circus of mediocrity.
Game 59 vs. Det., W 2-11: The fun thing about anomalies is that you never know when they will knock in some runs for you. Le Tigres' Justin Verlander started the game that gave the Cards a hungry baker's dozen of runs. In the first inning alone, Verlander gave up four runs including one on a balk. It's 2006 all over again. Quick sell all your Citigroup stock! (Sorry, Mets.)
Game 60 vs. Det., W 3-4: Colonel Wellemeyer gave his bi-monthly good start as he went 5.1 innings allowing only 2 runs. Blogger Curtis Granderson went 3-for-4 with two runs batted in and The Big Tilde [Ed. note: Suck-up!] took care of the other RBI. Rasmus got a couple Redbird RBIs including one off his first career triple. I guess he's ready for "the talk." Yadi went daisy and Ludwick somehow got a bases loaded walk. I love you, Tigers pitchers.
Game 61 vs. Det., L 6-3: Young Rick Porcello started for the Fightin' Susses and this mere fact gave self-righteous media types an excuse to criticize the organization for being cheap, conveniently ignoring the fact that 13 other organizations found the Boras-inflated asking price too much. Golden God Porcello went 5.2 innings allowing three runs, one of which was earned. The other guy (Piñeiro) went seven innings allowing four runs, only one of which was earned. In fact, the other guy, after the first inning, retired 16 straight. But he isn't the State of New Jersey Pitching Prodigy.
Games 62-64 vs. K.C., W 29-11: The Cards scoring nearly 30 runs in three games isn't indicative of their current hitting problems. It's nice to put these games in the win column, but c'mon. The Royals, dude.
Game 65 vs. N.Y., L 6-4: Wellemeyer went back to his reliable run per inning self against a couple Mets and some triple-A guys. Tim Redding pitched way too well for being Tim Redding, allowing four runs in seven innings. Cards had a chance to take the lead late, but Lord Pujols took a bad swing in an event that can only be described as a sign of his disapproval of his supporting cast.
Game 66 vs. N.Y., W 3-0: Piñeiro once again threw his Amazing Sinking Magic Ball for a complete game, 100-pitch shutout. Pujols hit two RBIs and that was more than enough for Jo-El, who himself hit a single and a double in the game.
Game 67 vs. N.Y., L 11-0: "Hey, Babyface. If you pitch, kind of okay, we'll let you take Wellemeyer's spot." In the dugout after the 5th inning: "Yeah, that's not going to do it."
Game 68 vs. N.Y., L 3-2: Carpenter pitched in his usual great manner but still lost because Johan Santana is damn good and the Cards offense is not. They got seven hits off the high priced Mets pitcher but couldn't get more than two runs. This game, even though it was against one of the best pitchers in the league, really pushed the notion that the Cards needed another hitter that could produce runs.
Game 69 vs. Min., L 1-3: Wainright went seven innings and allowed only three runs but the Cardinals offense was stil stuck in beautiful Kansas City, apparently. They could only muster one run off of Restaurant Glen Perkins.This is a low point in the season.
Game 70 vs. Min., W 3-5: A way out in the Midwest, there was a fella, I want to tell you about, fella by the name of Albert Pujols. At least that was the handle his lovin' parents gave him but he didn't have much use for it himself. This Pujols, he called himself The Machine. Now, Machine, there's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then there was a lot about The Machine that didn't make a lot of sense to me. They call St. Louis the murder capital of the United States. I didn't find it to be that, exactly, but they hold their own in killing folks. 'Course I can't say I've ever seen Detroit, and I never been to D.C, and I ain't never seen no queen in her damned undies as the fella says. But I'll tell you what, after seeing St. Louis and this here story I'm about to unfold, well I guess I seen somethin' every bit as stupefyin' as ya's see in any of those other places, and in English, too, so I can die with a smile on my face without feelin' like the good Lord gypped me. In other words, Pujols went 2-for-2 with 2 home runs and four RBI. The Machine abides.
Game 71 vs. Min., L 2-6: Mark DeRosa made his Cardinals debut in this game and the fans gave him an ovation as if he was Larry Walker. To be fair, DeRosa does sort of sound Canadian. He didn't get a hit, but the guys around him that he could replace all got on base one way or another. Unfortunately, the Cards lost, but at least they have the third baseman they have been looking for all year.