Making choices determines the course of life, and making informed choices paves the way for a beautiful one. Surrogacy is a challenging journey, and those who play the role of surrogate are to be admired.
When we hear the word surrogacy, it is instinctual to think first of the partnership between the woman who is carrying the baby and the parents who are waiting to hold the baby in their arms. In generic cases it is usually a mother-to-mother thing, but now, with changed perceptions, surrogacy for gays has come up, challenging some of society’s hypocritical norms.
To bring up a child, is it necessary to have a father and a mother? Can’t a baby be brought up with two fathers to care for him, cater to his needs, act as his mentors, and teach him valuable life lessons?
In liberal-thinking countries all over the world, the legalization of gay marriage has brought hope to millions. The lives of many gay couples, who were once forced to keep their relationships in darkness, have now been illuminated with freedom. Parenting is now a subject of discussion for gay couples. More gay couples are opting for surrogacy to experience the joy of parenthood. Sociologists observe that children with gay parents show more empathy for social diversity, and are less confined by gender stereotypes.
The idea of surrogacy for gay men has gained momentum now; gay couples are looking for women who would bear their children. Here are few of the available options for gay parents:
- Donation of sperm from one of the fathers in a couple, for those that wish for a child that is genetically related to one of the parents
- If either of the partners has viable sperm, they can engage in sexual intercourse with a consenting surrogate mother in order to conceive
- Artificial insemination or in-vitro fertilization (IVF) can be completed for the surrogate mother
There a are two kinds of in-vitro fertilization:
- Traditional: the surrogate mother is implanted with the sperm of one of the two gay men or a donor, by way of IVF. The sperm sample is collected either through masturbation or by removing it from the scrotum.
- Gestational: the egg is taken from the surrogate mother, fertilized in a lab setting with sperm from one of the gay men or another donor, and then implanted into the surrogate mother again.
A tandem cycle allows both parents to have the chance to obtain multiple embryos; some eggs are fertilized by one father and the remaining ones by the other. While there is no guarantee that both embryos will be implanted, it gives both fathers an equal chance for being biological parents.
The chances of pregnancy for a surrogate mother will be higher if more than one egg is fertilized and if fertility drugs are taken.
There is nothing like the experience of raising a child. The moment she walks, when she calls out to you, when she smiles, or when she touches you – those moments all equal bliss in the eyes of the doting parent. Being a gay parent doesn’t change the fact that a life that is dependent on you. Two fathers or one father and one mother, the child doesn’t care as long as he is loved and cared for. Surrogacy for gays has made that dream come true for thousands of gay couples who have the heart of father but never dared to dream about it because of their sexual orientation. Surrogacy for gays has finally made those dreams realizable.