Dear Karl Rove and George Bush:
This is your nemesis and leader of Al-Qaeda, Osama Bin Laden. Remember me? I am the one that masterminded 9-11, killing three thousand Americans and bringing down the twin towers. It seems you only care about me during political campaign season. What gives?
I just want to mention one brief issue. It appears Judith Miller has finally been broken and now she will testify before the Grand Jury in the Karl Rove, Scooter Libby CIA leak case. I am sorry that some of your inner circle are likely to be charged criminally for causing the security breach and / or lying to authorities, but I would like to thank you myself for the breach.
Without your help in outing Valerie Plame and her entire worldwide, undercover WMD apparatus, it would have been much harder to obtain WMD and it is likely many of my men would have been duped by spies connected to her operation and would have been arrested by your security forces.
Petty retribution against the wife of Joseph Wilson emboldened me in a real way, and I couldn’t be more thankful. In fact, you should have listened to Joseph Wilson. Iraq had nothing to do with 9-11. Saddam Hussein was a secular dictator that I loathed and could not do business with. But now, nearly the whole of Iraq is available to me to perform my terrorist activities and to use your presence as a tool to gain young, malleable new terrorists. I could not thank you more, praise be to Allah.
On a personal note, you said you would fire anyone involved in the leak. Now that we know Rove and Libby were involved, you flip-flopped and you are keeping them in your inner-circle. If you were at all interested in this national security breach, all you have to do is walk down the hall and ask Rove or Scooter, “What happened?” or “Why did you do this?”
My war against America and the Jews is real, but I guess to you, the “war on terror” is just a political game you pay lip service to in order to win elections. In fact, I should have known this before because when Bill Clinton launched a cruise missile strike against me, you were more interested in DNA stains on Monica Lewinsky’s blue dress.
Anyways, I have to go. While your military is being broken down by thousands of tiny cuts in Iraq, I am free to plot and operate anywhere in the world, including most of Iraq. It is a shame that fine enablers like Karl Rove and Scooter Libby have to be removed from the scene, but hey, it couldn’t have happened to a better bunch of guys.
Osama Bin Laden