Are you afraid? And would facing your fear give you the edge you are looking for? Because with Mercury conjunct Saturn, square Pluto, your chart suggests this is possible.
I would advise you to ask yourself these sorts of questions, because they might just lead you somewhere new and more satisfying than where you’ve been before. This is how life is. Ultimately, we progress.
And it could be your husband is really plain vanilla — that he simply lacks the capacity. And if this is true you will have to deal with it. But you owe it to yourself to find out, and I mean, find out for sure. Good luck.
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Article comments
1 - RJ Elliott
So, let's recap: You broke your marital vows once physically, and countless other times emotionally. Your husband found out about this, yet still took you back. And now you're worried that you might do it again, despite all the church-going.
You didn't mention any kids being in the picture, so I'll assume there aren't any. GOOD!
You need to leave this poor man before you screw him over any further. Then, once you are single again, you are free to engage in whatever twisted sexual depravities your sick soul desires.
Have fun being single and choking on a ball-gag!
2 - Scarlett
I think the above comment from R J Elliot was heartless, insensitive and pig-ignorant. And i am surprised it was not deleted as the feedback info clearly states that personal attacks are not allowed.
I can really empathise with you. I have been/still am there. Elsa has some wise words in her response but as a Christian i would urge you to do everything within your power to save your marriage if at all possible. There is an excellent website called the submissive wife projects (assuming you are a bottom or submissive and not a top or Domme). I am sure you will find much very useful information there.
The very best of luck to you.
HUGS Scarlett
3 - Bill
I've been there since for ever... I'm heavily into BDSM and those thoughts are hardly ever far.
I love my partner very much, but she doesn't know about my dominant side... I've had online affairs but never in real life since we go together.
You have my support, it is a heartbreaking problem.
4 - Anon7
The fatalistic answer given you that you can not change is I think both sad and wrong.
A person can change almost anything they wish in themselves, if not then dependent personalities should just keep drinking or drudging.. its just their nature. Bullies should just keep hurting others.. its just their nature etc...
You may not ever be able to not have all the desires go away all the time. We all have desires that we do not want. its how we act on them that matters.
My best wises to you and your husband.