What are people so damned afraid of hearing that they have to make so much noise all the time? Whether it's having their televisions or radios on all the time, roaring around in cars with special attachments to make them louder, or continually talking at the tops of their voices, they always sound like they're trying desperately to drown something out.
They can't go out into their gardens without taking some sort of power tool with them; hedge trimmer, lawnmower, weed whacker, leaf blower, or chain saw. Heaven forbid they should actually sit still and enjoy the restful attributes of a beautiful garden or a secluded yard. It's as if they only created these places as arenas for utilizing the latest in lawn gizmos and excuses to make even more noise.
Gone are the idyllic days when husbands had to be booted out of the hammock and away from their beer and rest in order to mow, maybe trim the lawn. It now seems everyone can’t wait to get out there and get at it to make some noise. Did they misunderstand the KISS concert they went to all those years ago when they were urged to make some noise? Instead of recognising it for the same old rock star bullshit, they have taken it as their personal mantra for middle age and beyond.
You can almost see their lips moving, repeating the magic words "make some noise, make some noise," over and over again. Perhaps they think by chanting the words in accompaniment to the actions of churning out hundreds if not thousands of decibels, they would be able to reclaim some of their lost youth. Who knows?
It's not just men either; women can be just as bad. They have even more ways of drowning out the world around them at their disposal aside from garden tools and electric saws. Vacuums. Good lord, some of them are as loud as power sanders and probably have the same effect on carpets as sanders have on wooden floors. Stripping layers of carpet away and not just lifting the dirt off.
Of course, they also have the television on while they are vacuuming. In order to hear over the noise they make while sanding their carpets, they have to crank the volume on the set so high it throws the sonar of passing airplanes out of whack and sends them off course.
I used to wonder why people standing next to each other were shouting loud enough for others two blocks away to hear. It's because they've gone deaf from their damned noisemakers and can't carry on a conversation anymore without shouting.
Article comments
1 - JR
I hear ya.