Because God is God and He knows everything about us, He knew my struggle with accepting His love for me. Galatians 3 speaks of obedience to the Old Testament Law. He knew my struggle to live up to those things was hindering my walk with Him. I was missing the abundance of His love.
Surrender is not only dying to oneself but it is also, in a sense, dying to the law.
“10 For all who rely on the works of the law are under a curse, as it is written: "Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law."[a]
11 Clearly no one who relies on the law is justified before God, because "the righteous will live by faith."[b]
12 The law is not based on faith; on the contrary, it says, "The person who does these things will live by them."[c]
13 Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: "Cursed is everyone who is hung on a pole."[d]
14 He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus,
so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit."
I recognized that even the most religious people are guilty of sin. Each of us will fall short of God's standards. God uses His laws to expose sin. They are the guidelines set in order for us to "live right". We do not earn God's favor by obeying "the law". God blesses us when we choose to surrender our lives in faith to Him through obedience.
Suddenly the position that Jesus had in my life became that much more significant. My salvation is NOT about anything I do or do not do. If that were the case, then Christ suffered and died on the cross for nothing. There is nothing I can do “to earn” my salvation. Instead, I must have faith in God and His word by following the example that Jesus set and surrender my life. What a relief.
Again, I realized that Satan could use anyone to whisper lies into my heart.
God loves me no matter what I do or say. I cannot lose His love. For me, this became yet another fantastic revelation and brought about a tremendous source of peace.