“Are you ready, Daddy?”
“Bring it on!” I said flatly as I pointed the gun right at his face. He hates being squirted in the face, so I figured this would turn him back and convince him that shooting me was a big mistake.
Wrong.
He moved his face about three inches closer to the gun as if to challenge me to shoot him. After a moment of silence he raised his gun slowly and without another word he started shooting me in the stomach and the groin.
In a frenzy I tried to shoot back with my empty gun, shaking it violently, hoping to get something to come out. I have no idea why, but I’m still under the impression that I can scare him off, so I wasn’t backing down. It wasn’t working, and I started feeling the water thru my clothes. I finally gave up and tossed the gun back on the table and sat down in the chair.
Wet. Confused. Defeated.
I didn’t realize at first what had just happened, but my neighbor did. He was laughing uncontrollably at my demise. Then it dawned on me: Cz set me up! He put that empty gun on the table knowing full well I’d try to use it against him but couldn’t. He made sure his gun was full and mine was empty – then he called me out and I foolishly took the bait: hook, line, and sinker. He planned this thing from the start knowing exactly how I’d react and that there’d be nothing I could do.
He pulled it off brilliantly from start to finish. I would have never thought a three-year-old would be able to plan something so devious, so completely, and actually have everything go according to plan. I won’t underestimate him again.
I put the blame squarely on my wife.
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