From my own clinical experience I offer you these additional insights to Dr. Satel's article. What follows are common myths the seeker of self-knowledge may fall prey to. I offer these not to dissuade you from seeking self-understanding, which I do believe is a noble pursuit, but to help you avoid traps that will derail your process by giving you a false resting place on the journey. If you are willing to take the journey, you owe it to yourself to be sure of your destination, and what you will need for the trip.
Understanding gives us a sense of control. If I know why something bad has happened, I stand a chance of preventing it from happening again. Likewise, if I see something bad happen to someone else and can determine why, I can keep myself safe. You may have read my recent article on Michael Schwass, who just passed the 31st anniversary of the injury that left him quadriplegic. He deliberately entitled his book, Don't Blame the Game. He knew that many would look at his quadriplegia and conclude, "Oh, but he was playing hockey, a notoriously brutal sport. Ah, I get it." His answer is, "No, you don't get it."
In Michael’s view, which is highly spiritual with a karmic perspective, pointing to hockey as the reason his life took the turn it did is too simplistic. Is his perspective right? Who are we to say? It may be a much more comfortable place for some to look at the risks of a dangerous sport than to think about life being subjected to such intangibles and mysterious forces as karma.
Look at the flipside with Lance Armstrong's book, It's Not About the Bike. Same thing. If we seek to understand why someone does something well, we can increase the chances of our own success. When I put up my photography site, I got asked over and over what kind of camera I use. It's an old and extremely limited camera. It isn't about the camera.
Understanding helps us assign proper blame. This is an extension of the first point. If I know for certain that my mother is the root of every trouble I have, I have a reason that allows me to let go of some responsibility. If the work of turning my life around simply feels too hard to me (and it may be VERY hard), I get a sanctioned way out of it if I hang on to the belief that it wasn't my fault to begin with. Personal responsibility starts to feel like an option.
Let me just go on record saying, this: It isn't.






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