It was reported the next day that a German rogue military group calling itself "The Red Army" had taken responsibility for this horrific attack, one of many violent acts in a long stream carried out by the terrorist faction called the Sigurd Debus unit. Eighteen US Airmen were injured, along with a Brigadier General who lost his leg, a Lieutenant, and two West German visitors. The car, loaded with explosives and left in the parking lot in front of the building, must have detonated earlier than planned, because the majority of the workforce was not present when the explosion's thundering boom ripped through the quiet morning air.
Germany and my Air Force career were over in my mind. Now, I was no longer eager to go to work, socialize with my coworkers, or communicate with my family back home in the States. The few people I considered friends I avoided. I didn't know it at the time but I was suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Life no longer seemed as promising as it once had, and the realization that living in the United States would be so much safer was screaming out loud in my mind. I was scared. Pursuing an early out of my assignment was now front and center. I wanted to leave Germany and the Air Force behind me. I wanted to move on.
"Remembering, Remembering, that sweet world so bitter to taste."
- Jack Kerouac, Desolation Angels
According to Helpguide.org, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is a normal reaction by sane people to a traumatic situation or event. It can be brought on by a many types of of events and experienced by people from all walks of life. Past and present wars; natural disasters such as hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes and wildfires; terrorist attacks like 9-11, Beirut, suicide bombs in Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Israel and Palestine; the genocide in Darfur; the drug wars in Mexico; the hate crimes and gang wars of the United States; rape and domestic violence against women; robberies and riots; the social uprising in Iran...the list can go on and on into infinity.
The symptoms of PTSD can be as varied and nuanced as the causes. They can include feelings of detachment, avoidance of others, depression, and numbness. Over-sensitivity and bipolar mood swings are the hallmarks of this condition. Left untreated it can lead to violence against others and suicide due to self-loathing.
For some people suffering from PTSD, seeking treatment can be as simple as joining a support group and connecting to others with the disorder. Many people seek professional therapy, and doctors can prescribe medication. However, the vast majority of individuals suffering from PTSD never seek treatment; they live in deep, dark denial, self-medicating with alcohol, or with marijuana or other illegal drugs, in an effort to keep their inner wolves at bay.
Article comments
1 - roger nowosielski
A beautiful piece, Jeannie, and so moving. I only hope we should all try to understand you better and see more than mere pixels on the computer screen.
2 - Jon Sobel
Beautifully expressed.
3 - roger nowosielski
Well, Jeannie. I'm not alone. You have another admirer.
Check Jon's blogsite, though. You'll find him to be quite talented, too.
There's hope for America, after all, if it keeps on producing so many talented people and artists. I don't want to be stinking rich. I'll just take "the room with a view" (E. M. Forster), or better yet, "a room of my own" (Virginia Woolf), and I'll be happy. And cases of cheap white vine so I could finish my masterpiece.
Screw the rest.
4 - Jeannie Danna
Thank you Roger, actually I just popped back out on to this page!
I did check out Jon's blogs, in-fact I have The Stone Coyotes on my browser right now..:)
5 - Jeannie Danna
Thank you Jon, I don't know what to say, now there's a first!
6 - roger nowosielski
Just looked at it. What's the connection with Jon Sobel?
It mentions Elmore Leonard's "Be Cool," another great writer. But the one that will really blow you away is none other than James Ellroy. If you think that "The Black Dahlia" is any good, I've got news for you.
Read "American Tabloid" and weep.
7 - Christopher Rose
Another great piece of writing, Jeannie. Just remember to hold on to the love and let go of the paranoia.
8 - roger nowosielski
Just occurred to me, Jeannie. The events you describe remind me of John le Carré's Absolute Friends.
The story is told from the opposite point of view - that of "the terrorists'" - but the scene of action is also in Germany and the story is contemporary.
You should look it up.
9 - Jeannie Danna
Thanks Chris, I will try, but you know that comment thread..:) ha ha