My old pal, Ego, paid me a visit this week. To make a long story short, on Monday a guy at my office was fired. I had predicted it a few months ago. The first time I met the man, he was interviewing for a position. I told my boss that I believed he was mentally unstable and should not be hired. I am not in Human Resources and there is no reason why my opinion would (or should) matter under the circumstances; so, the powers that be did not agree and hired him anyway.
I forgot about the whole thing until this week when I found out that the guy had been fired. I don't know the facts of why he was fired, but when I heard the news (even without knowing the facts), my immediate reaction was a feeling of great satisfaction that I had been “right.” I kept these feelings to myself for the most part (thank goodness), but internally I was busting with self-satisfaction that I had been right and others had been wrong. (I should emphasize that this was a big assumption on my part — I don't even know if it is true.)
Despite the fact that I didn't even know if what I believed was true, my gigantic ego reared its ugly head and all I could feel was huge pride that I had been able to perceive something about this person that most others had not. I don’t know why I felt such pride about that fact –- it is most likely simply because every one of us loves to be right. I mean, who doesn't want to be right? Right?
My ego expanded exponentially at the notion that I am more skilled at “reading” people than most. I was overjoyed at how perceptive I had been. I had predicted what others had not -– how much fun is that? Then, for some reason (I’m not sure why — I don't remember anyone saying anything to trigger it), it hit me like a bolt out of nowhere: shame. What on earth was I feeling so smug about? This person had lost his job –- possibly because he was an unfortunate victim of mental or emotional illness. Why was I feeling giddy about this fact? Because I had been right about something that resulted in another person’s serious misfortune?
Article comments
1 - Joanne Huspek
Heh. You'll find a lot of people on this site who delight. :-)
2 - Dr. Juliann Mitchell, PhD
Legna,
I really enjoyed your article and loved the introspection. Having the capacity to read people can be both a blessing and a bane. Thank you for an honest, thoughtful piece.
Best wishes,
Juliann Mitchell
3 - Legna Moned
Thank you very much for your feedback on the article. Whenever I am certain that I have learned all I need to know about the workings of my own mind (or others), that's when it hits me how very far I have to go. Thanks again.
Warm regards,
Legna Moned
4 - Bill Frase
Legna,
I liked your article a lot. Every moment is a perfect teacher if we pause long enough to really listen. Keep on listening to your life, and we can all learn along with you. As you well know, when it comes to developing greater compassion for ourselves and others, we all have our work cut out for us. Keep it up!
5 - Dr Dreadful
"Tempting as it may be at times, I believe that the job of a professional news network is to simply tell us what has happened " not to advise, comment, or editorialize about it."
That wouldn't be a news network, it would be a wire service.