As a heterosexual, I'm doing my part to stop gay marriage: I pledge never, ever to marry a gay person, male or female.
Won't you join me? Together, we can banish this menace--without resorting to a constitutional amendment.
So, if you're a devotee of the heterosexual lifestyle (whether you practice or not, so all you lonelyhearts are welcome, too), simply sign up now.
Thank you for your support.
Article comments