How well can you get to know someone in ten minutes or less? If you believe the claims of the many speed dating companies springing up all around the country, the answer is “pretty well.” Well enough, in fact, to justify another meeting that many of us bipedal mammals refer to as “dating.”
It’s a fair claim for the most part; it really doesn’t take that long to get to know somebody on a topical level. Many of the dating services I’ve researched have gone as far as to provide a list of suggested questions, as opposed to suggestive ones, to get things rolling. This name, rank, and serial number approach to meeting people usually consists of learning about the other person’s profession and their various like and dislikes.
I recently decided to take the plunge and try out this alleged utopia of single souls that, for one reason or another, weren’t meeting people the conventional way. I still find I am arguing with myself over what finally made me whip out my credit card (as opposed to something else I’ll leave to the readers imagination) and sign up for a session of speed dating.
My favorite reason is curiosity. While that’s partly true, it’s also a convenient excuse to avoid admitting I’m particularly bad at meeting women unless I have a non-romantic reason to speak to them. I don’t know if that’s because, in High School, my humor got me by and most of the girls I dated approached me, or that I'm rather self-conscious and don’t want to come off as a letch on the make.
The next reason that comes to mind is the hope of meeting “the one.” It’s a good reason and probably quite valid, but it’s something the pessimistic part of me put somewhere in the odds of finding intelligent life on the set of American Idol. That’s more a comment on my pre-conceived notions on the whole idea of speed dating than a comment on the people involved.
The third and final reason wins out - the simple desire for companionship and someone to share my life with. No matter how introverted and shy I’ve become, I still, like the majority of people, feel the need to share myself with someone. It’s the one mystery of existence that constantly plagues and motivates me at the same time.
I soon found myself at a random Martini bar in the central part of Denver, Colorado. I walked into the bar with my fight or flee instincts sumo-wrestling in my head and approached the greeting table. I was given a nametag that also contained a number that would help match me with potential “second-dates” online after the event was over. It was part of the rules (who knew there were rules to dating?) to set up a post small-talk second date with the help of the dating service.
Everyone was instructed, several times by my count, to mark “interested,” “not interested,” or “networking” on the provided score card and let the service put you in contact with anyone who felt the same. This is, of course, because speed dating is a business designed to make the owners some coin, and not the noble humanitarian effort it should be.
Article comments
1 - Elsa
I feel disappointed there's no picture in your bio. I am curious to check you out! :P
2 - Triniman
Interesting article.
In my city's main newspaper, there was a story about the dating scene in which single events were organized. You had to bring a single person. For her birthday party, the originator of the event decided that since most of her friends were single, to have an event with friends in which they also bring single people. Eventually, she ended up getting married to one of people who attended after putting on several events.
A new pair of singles took over the event and they are now called "Hitch" parties, after the Will Smith movie. The last event had 150 people.
3 - Triniman
Oh, this is their website: hitchparties.com
The concept may not be new elsewhere, but I think it's new in my city (Winnipeg, Canada.)
4 - ProudBison
Just checked the website... As a Winnipeger, I'm glad to see that there are some people willing to do something about our limited nightlife. As a single young 30-something, its nice to know that I have other options of meeting single women.
The women at the last party are definitely a good reason to check out the next event.
Great job to the two guys that are organizing it!
Unfortunately, I won't be in Winnipeg for their next event. Can't wait for the next Hitch party!