Next issue for couples: Do we have a clear idea of each other's financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?
I would add, for those of you moving in the direction of a pre-nuptual agreement: be very honest about how you feel. I have said many times - and nothing you can say will change my mind - that they are a recipe for marital disaster. By definition you are building mistrust into the relationship. Don't believe me? I have evidence to back me up.
Further, talk about your relationship not just with money, but with "stuff". Everyone can talk budgets but the proof is in the pudding. What spending habits are you actually demonstrating? How many times have you, or your partner, convinced yourself that a certain expenditure was exceptional because the price was so good, when the truth is you can't walk by a sale rack without getting sweaty palms?
People are funny with money, one of the most abstract concepts there is. Numbers go into the account, numbers go out. If only I had a nickle for every man who complained to me that he had become a wallet for his family and that no one seemed to realize that their spending was obligating him to stay in a career he hated. Hey, wait, I do get nickles for that! Dollars even. On second thought, don't talk about this. You could put me out of business.
But if you must, do talk about your career happiness and long-term goals and dreams. What if the primary breadwinner is laid off? Is the other partner willing and able to step up and become a full-time earner if necessary? Does one of you have a dream of self-employment? Is one of you entrepreneurial? How prepared are you both to deal with fluctuating incomes and career experimentation? Would a return to school be supported?
Article comments
1 - RJ Elliott
"Questions To Ask Before You Get Married"
1 - Do you go down?
If not, RUN!!! (do not walk!!!) away. I mean, you'd just cheat anyway...
2 - You got the HIV?
If yes, this probably isn't going to be a long-term relationship.
3 - Ever have sex with a family member?
Unless you live in Kentucky (where such a thing is kind of a 200-year old fad), a "yes" answer should elicit a "no" answer for you.
4 - How many chromosomes do you have?
If she answers anything other than 46, flee as quickly as possible. She's either a 'gloid, or a member of a different species. Either way, she probably doesn't have the requisite qualities it takes to build a lasting relationship. (Unless you live in Kentucky. See #3 above.)
5 - Do you want to drug me, cut me open, and harvest my kidneys, so that you may sell them on the black market to Asian traders, while I doze in a bathtub filled with ice cubes?
If she says "yes," that could be a really bad sign, depending on how big her tits are. And if she goes down (see #1).
2 - Matthew T. Sussman
And ladies, he's single!
3 - RJ Elliott
ROTFL...
4 - Zedd
Laura
An important one is how his family resolves disputes.
If everyone yells and uses profanity and you were talked to and explained to, RUN!!
You'll think he's dumb, mean and uncouth and he will think you are a door mat just waiting to be pounced on.