Pope Watch: What Were They Thinking?

Author: bhwPublished: Apr 07, 2005 at 9:35 am 21 comments


What was George W. Bush thinking?

George W. Bush viewing the pope's body
This guy gave me no end of crap about the Iraq war, and I have to come here and KNEEL?

What was Laura Bush thinking?


Laura bush viewing the pope's body

Condi can pray all she wants, but with God as my witness, those ruby slippers are MINE.

What was George H.W. Bush thinking?


George H.W. Bush viewing the pope's body
Gee, he kinda reminds me of Bar when she's greased for a conjugal visit.

What was Bill Clinton thinking?


Bill Clinton viewing the pope's body
Eighty-four years without getting laid....He and Hillary have a lot in common.

What was Condoleezza Rice thinking?


Condoleezza Rice viewing the pope's body
For once, I won't be the only one in the picture who looks like a corpse.


Well, what do you think they were thinking?

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Article comments

  • 1 - Lisa McKay

    Apr 07, 2005 at 10:20 am

    I am thinking that this was hilarious :-)

  • 2 - andy marsh

    Apr 07, 2005 at 10:29 am

    Let's see....Laura was thinking, why do I always have to sit next to dad?

    Condi was thinking...I should have worn the leather again...

    Bill was thinking...I'm not the one who's supposed to be on my knees!

    GWB was thinking...he was the president of what country?

    GHWB was thinking...how do we get jeb in there after Juniors' done?

    Or maybe not...

  • 3 - Lisa McKay

    Apr 07, 2005 at 10:31 am

    Well done, Andy...and it's not even Friday!

  • 4 - bhw

    Apr 07, 2005 at 10:33 am

    Excellent, Andy!

  • 5 - ClubhouseCancer

    Apr 07, 2005 at 11:14 am

    W: "Where the hell are George and Ringo?"


  • 6 - DrPat

    Apr 07, 2005 at 11:42 am

    George W: (Pee-euw!) Remind me to get embalmed for my own funeral...

    Laura: With my eyes closed, it's almost like a Protestant service.

    George Sr: Hey Jimmah! Nyah, nyah, nah-nyah nyah!

    Clinton: Just keep telling yourself, once Hillary is officially running, you can blow off these hicks for good.

    Rice: Heu miser indigne frater adempte mihi. Nunc tamen interea haec, prisco quae more parentum tradita sunt tristi munere ad inferias, accipe fraterno multum manantia fletu, atque in perpetuum, frater, ave atque vale.

  • 7 - andy marsh

    Apr 07, 2005 at 1:35 pm

    DrPat - I like the George Sr. one. I'm copying and pasting the Condi one to my latin-american dictionary...I'll be back!

  • 8 - andy marsh

    Apr 07, 2005 at 1:39 pm

    You know what they say Lisa, even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and then!

  • 9 - Lisa McKay

    Apr 07, 2005 at 1:41 pm

    Or even a broken clock is right twice a day...

  • 10 - andy marsh

    Apr 07, 2005 at 1:43 pm

    That would require me to come up with 2 good things in a day...that's pushing it!

  • 11 - DrPat

    Apr 07, 2005 at 1:50 pm

    Save your time, Andy - the quote is from Catullus's elegy at his brother's grave:

    Alas! my brother, so cruelly torn from me, accept at least these funeral gifts, much bedewed with tears, which, by ancestral custom, have been laid here as offerings to the dead; and for ever, brother, hail and farewell.

  • 12 - andy marsh

    Apr 07, 2005 at 2:24 pm

    I figured it pretty much meant, I'm smarter than all you SOB's and I speak latin fluently, so get away from me!

  • 13 - Natalie Davis

    Apr 07, 2005 at 2:24 pm

    Hilarious! Laughter and tears all at once...

    All the shots of Wojytla's shoes crack me up. The pontiff's red-shod tootsies were at some weird 60-ish degree angle (although, on closer inspection, they were nonintersecting rays) for the first two days of the Roman takeover. They look better now. Someone fixed 'em, and thank the goddess for that.

    Someone tell me why, for the love of Pete, a grown woman is spending so much time looking at some dead guy's feet. Talked to my mom on the phone... the subject got around to the pope. Mom said, "What's the deal with his FEET???" I howled. My mom's as nuts as her firstborn.

    I'll bet Slick Willie would like his own pair of ruby red slippers too. He's a pretty flashy guy, a sharp dresser, a dandy, a rake, right?

    Red slippers. There's no place like home. Bring out the short guy: "Karol's most sincerely dead, all poped out after being too pooped to pope anymore." I hope the Polish pilgrims made it into Vatican City in time to see tomorrow's funeral.

    Anyway, forgive the papal stream of consciousness: I'm just glad they adjusted his feet before the Slickmeister and the Shrub Gang showed up. And Bill on his knees is just TOO delicious.

  • 14 - Nigel Pond

    Apr 08, 2005 at 1:01 pm

    Maybe Condi should stay the weekend in Rome and buy herself a new wardrobe -- most of the stuff she wears is ghastly., At least Italian designers know how to cut clothes properly...

  • 15 - Antfreeze

    Apr 08, 2005 at 3:47 pm

    Jumping Jeebus people. A little crude when he's quite obviously not even in the ground yet. Remind me not to become Pope and die eh.

  • 16 - HW Saxton

    Apr 08, 2005 at 5:39 pm

    Bill:"Out of all the hot babes in Rome
    I'm stuck sitting next to her"?

    George Sr:"Thank god I'm away from that
    nagging ass Barbara.

    George Jr:

    Laura:"Bill,is that a crucifix in your
    pocket or are you just happy to see me?

    Condi: "Say Bill,What kind of meat do
    priests eat on fridays?"

    Bill: I don't know.

    Condi: "Nun".


  • 17 - DrPat

    Apr 08, 2005 at 6:22 pm

    I hope she told that joke in a whisper - did you see the phalanx of religious ladies in the row behind the featured five?

  • 18 - gonzo marx

    Apr 08, 2005 at 6:25 pm

    Official Pope Watch Alert..

    as of 6:23 easter standard time, the Official Pope Watch has an Announcement!

    ummm..yep, he's still dead...

    Excelsior!

  • 19 - Eric Olsen

    Apr 08, 2005 at 7:37 pm

    totally hilarious bhw!

    All good popes go to heaven

  • 20 - Matt

    Apr 08, 2005 at 7:42 pm

    Laura was thinking, "Hmm...this is the first time I've ever been on my knees."

  • 21 - Daniel

    Sep 27, 2005 at 5:16 am

    This is a postcard example of our missing value and virtue of morality in this world today. Very sad...

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