"Well, what I can tell you", he'd related, "Is that she digs you back. I think. I think I can tell you that."
Gentleman stood by the bar lets a roar out his arse sounds like a twelve-tonne 'ruption midst a buffalo's bollocks. He'd fallen asleep five or six pints ago, shaken out the stupor by this gargle in his trousers.
"I swear to God" Maja says, "If I don't get to a toilet my c*nt's gonna explode."
She wanders off t'wards the ladies, Sir Fleming all inquisitive round about the chin; "So, what? Is there stuff goin' on?"
I dunno, is what I say.
Last night or the night before that, I can't say which night, I popped a sleeper on the tongue an wept for a time to "Hyper-Ballad". "I imagine what my body would sound like slamming against those rocks", Bjork was singin', "And would my eyes be closed or open?"
Monochrome emotions and Technicolor sweeps all swarming and buzzing round the marrow o' the bones, every word let rise from the beautifully ragged binding of Bjork's gullet tasting like kerosene kisses set light in my gut. The swell o' that chorus, those ineffably intense raptures cascading back and forth between the speakers, they overcame a fella, you dig, this thunderin' narcotic in the head-holes, those processed gargles staggerin' long the melodies all twisted round one another's thighs.
Somewheres in the midst of all this, I sent a txt message to Carole along the lines of; "I think maybe we should discuss stuff. That kinda stuff. Maybe. I might be thinking things. I dunno. My head's afire with Bjork."
What came back was "We can discuss those things any time you feel we should."
The sleeper kicked in fore I had a chance to reply.
"And this", Sir Fleming says, gesturing round about, "This is where discussions are to be had?"
Me all shrugging. I dunno. I'd hope so, but who can tell?
Outside, the seaside township of Portstewart carries on about its business. Drunks roll cigarettes on storefront stoops and watch yon ocean swell and swirl ahead o' them. Nuns look out o'er the teenagers huddled together by the swings 'neath the convent walls, those teenagers with their bags fulla glue hung round their ears like feedbags. Men mingle awkwardly by the doors of the public shitters where it's a fiver for a quick one off the wrist and thirty of your finest notes if'n you fancy a rimmin. Mormon singers holler from the building used to be a nightclub, nightclub almost cost me my filth-cherry back in the day, if'n I hadn't been 17 and therefore fucked on vodka. Myself and a lass high on Bowie, we'd decided to leave the drinks for a moment, head out back the club and maybe lay a fumble cross the gravel. Me having trouble finding my way and she being in no state to guide me, we gave up tryin and headed back inside, just in time for to puke over a fruit machine and get in a fight with a fella out a pipe band.
Article comments
1 - Mat Brewster
Welcome back, Duke.
2 - Mark Saleski
i just KNEW there was a good reason ta get out of bed this morning!
3 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
good to be back, fellas. thank you. my, this is hella much longer than it looked in microsoft word...
4 - Aaron Fleming
Hurrah! What a tale!
And I must recount that simultaneously to the Duke's magical moment I was standing in a chinese take-out with an Icelandic gentleman placed in front of me at an extremely close proximity. "Fucking move!" I yelled in my head, but it was futile. Alas...
5 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
hah, sir fleming, thank you, and i see potential for a Rashomon style version. "what happened was this..." "no, what happened was THIS!"
what was that telly show with Donnie Whalberg that did that, also? the cop number?
6 - Eric Berlin
Anthony Burgess meets James Joyce meets some other literary figure I know not of fuck flung and mind scrambled to 2006 like warped tounge bizarro-genius made real.
Or: I approve !
7 - DJRadiohead
Duke, you are the straw that stirs this place. In other words, we've missed having you around.
Great stuff, as always.
8 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
Sirs Berlin and Dj, thank you. it feels hella good to have the scribblin goin on again, i was worried for a week or two, no doubt about that. now i got all sortsa crap fallin out the fingers. funny how these things work out.
9 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
and also, i must thank whoever spotlighted this wee tale. that was highly lovely and all sortsa gorgeous to wake up to.
10 - DJRadiohead
Fits and starts- I have the same thing. Weeks go by and I can't write shite and then I'll pen 4 things and do a podcast in the span of two days.
11 - steven
enjoyed the read. a way of words you have sir, What happens next? will enjoy hearin further mind waxes from you xxooxx
12 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
thank you, Steven. this particular tale ends here. a lovely friendship blossoms. our friends wander off t'wards ever more extravagant colours and shapes. and foo fighters records.
a new mind wax is in the writing, and should surface in the shortly-times, i would hope.
thanks again.
13 - Carole
this Carole chick sounds amazing with the purple whispers and all. What a lovely mind wax dear duke!