Soon enough, talk took a dive t'wards the mysteries o' the bollocks.
"See", he gets to yackin, "I fancy her, but I can't stand her. Mean to say, I love her, I think, but she curdles the pish in me guts."
Me all nodding. I understand, I'm saying, s'like that lad I asked out, and yet, hetero to the back a the nuts, I am.
"Aye, for sure." And then; "What?"
Sometimes a fella just stumbles into these things, just opens the yap without thinking and next thing anyone knows there he is, flailing in the hedgerows o' hell with those words round about slinging sulphur 'gainst his jowels for all eternity.
Well, like, y'know, that fella. I kinda, y'know.
"And did he?"
Well not then. Later on, like.
Later on round back the club, with the snow to the ankles and the mumbled beats all crashing from beyond the walls. Nothing X-rated, I'm telling him. Just. Y'know.
He studies the end o' his cigarette for a time. "This is some momentous fuckin shit you're flingin on me here."
A silence, aye, thick as the man-slush o' Zeus. Then it's all come on, for fucks sakes, the hell kinda tosser are you, anyroad, a big ol' tosser likes o' which I never once laid eyes on, that's what kind, if'n you accept that sorta banter as Gospel. Fuckin wi' your mentals like there's no tomorrow, that's what I'm doin' here an now.
Couple pints later it's forgotten.
On the kerb by the KFC, the lass is asking me, "So what, then?"
What what?
"Well, did you?"
A shrug from yours truly. Who's to say, in this day and age?
She stubs out a Regal King Size on the side of a bin, a White Nationalist Party sticker still visible even after the gallons of spit and disdain tossed in its direction these past few months. Wonder what they'd make of Brokeback Mountain, I'm thinking, and she's standing up, brushing the dirt off her coat.
"Probably the rotten bastard's would love it. It's got a faggot gettin' kicked in the face."
Aye.
Both of us sighing, and the evening all choking on promise.
Thanks folks.
Article comments
1 - Mary K. Williams
Wow - what a journey you take us on Duke. Speaking of journeys - I love the line:
she's got a passport in the back-pocket burning the flesh off a' her hide
Ya got the gift Lad.
2 - NR Davis
Hard as hell to read, but worthwhile nonetheless. Down with stereotypes! Death to the dominant hate-and-laziness-fueled paradigm!
3 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
Sir Mary, thank you. the good thing about this, as opposed to a review of the films mentioned up yonder, for example, is that i can kinda play around with the themes an stuff in them without feelin all sortsa self-indulgent. maybe this is even MORE self indulgent than usual, but at least it's clearly pointed out at the top. heh, but yes, thank you.
Ms. Davis (i'm right with the ms., yes?) thank you also. i made a conscious effort to try an make at least SOME of this more readable than usual. (it felt very odd putting "g" on the end of words like "putting" again). most of the more unreadable gumpf i tried to fling into quotation marks and the like. Nonetheless, i realise it may be a bit of a bother to wade through some of those paragraphs, but thank you for doin so, an yeah, stereotypes - best we set the fuckers alight here and now whilst the momentum's building.
4 - Aaron Fleming
Ah what a bright shinny new feature this is, and one hosted by no less than The Duke!
I agree on The Proposition, a mightily excellent film, unrelentingly vicious on its bludgeons of harshness.
Brokeback on the other hand I will probably never watch, for no other reason that it looks a bit dull to me.
5 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
Thank you, Sir Fleming!
i'm still coughin chunks of The Proposition out my eyes!
6 - DJRadiohead
The Duke... this is excellent here. As I just told Sir Saleski offline, I will now be unable to speak a decent AmericanEnglish sentence for at least a couple hours on account of having read your piece here and that just makes a fella start flinging fucks and slurring and swearing and muttering and the like.
Enough about me... Be Here Now? You're joking, right? I am. Sort of. Thing is... there are some good moments on that disc and it is made better in my mind by what followed (that being Shoulder of Giants.)
Can't wait until the next Mind Wax drops.
7 - Flapjack
Aye, here...here, aye....here.
Very much enjoyed that. Just wondering did you order the Proposition over the net or did you see it in yonder cinema somewhere? Surely it's not out yet is it? Dying to lay my McGonnagles on it.
8 - DJRadiohead
And how did this not turn into a gigantic Conorfest?
9 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
DJ - thank you, sorry it took a time to get to this. I dig the hell out Be Here Now, although, to be honest, it always sounds better in my head than it does when i go ahead and press play. Fade In / Out, Girl In The Dirt Shirt, I Hope I Think I know, those are great great songs.
As to how we / i avoided detailing further my hetero-conorist disposition, i dunno, to be honest. i'll make up for it in future.
Flapjack, thank you, m'dear. The Proposition is indeed in UK cinema-holes at this minute. whether or not your local multiplex gets it is, alas, a bit of a "who knows?" Hope you get to see it, though, one way or the other.