Step #4 – Do not be shy! Feel free to say hello. Do not be afraid to ask if we need help if you see us struggling up a hill or in a supermarket. Some of us are incredibly independent and as a result, we will politely decline. However, some of us do need help and appreciate the offer more than you realize.
By the same token, do not just come up and help without asking. The independent disabled individuals will be offended. It is best to ask first. You would not walk up to a stranger who could walk and start helping them without asking. You are liable to get maced! You would ask first, so please use the same courtesy when asking us if we need help.
Note: Unfortunately, in every community we do have some bad seeds. In general, most disabled people appreciate the offer of help whether needed or not. On occasion, someone may give you the look of death and act as though you have asked to cut off a limb of theirs. This is not most of us, so please do not think we all act this way!
In truth, we do not want your pity, your prayers, your good wishes, or your blessings unless we ask for them. We just want your friendship. So, next time you see a person in a wheelchair why not say hi, ask their interests, and get to know them. Chances are, you will not be disappointed and will make a new friend in the process.
Article comments
1 - Pekky Marquez
I am about to do an Internship in a Protection and Advocacy agency, and I want to thank you for this, for I find it trully inspiring and a guideline for me as well as for explaining others about the self-determination and "normal" (what is normal and who determines it anyway?) life of people with disabilities.
I have been interested a lot on what people have to say about self-determination, which is why I thank you for your article. Trully human. :)
Peace!
Pekky
2 - Snarkattack
Bloody inspiring, your article - thank you for sharing. I would do well to remember your situation next time I start complaining about my own (less severe) affliction. It sounds like you have achieved loads more than some of your healthier peers.
I'm with you on the education of others - that is one of the reasons that I'm open about my sickness. It's a bit different in that it's psychological but on occasion people do ask me some stupid things, or I might have to explain why going out in public isn't an option at certain times. Thank goodness for understanding friends and family.
3 - diana hartman
I am pleased to tell you this article is being featured in the Culture Focus today, August 15.
Diana Hartman
Culture Editor
4 - Dominick Evans
Thank you all for your kind words and for featuring this article. I feel it is incredibly important to helping to combat discrimination and facilitating understanding and discussion.
I am working on the second installment of this series so expect it to be available soon!