The Magical Hanukkahtime Section Variety Hour is an eight-day cruise through every section at BC Magazine except the one where the author has any knowledge whatsoever. On the first evening: BC Culture!
Turn your computer off. Go outside. Look around you. At least 58 percent of the people within 90 feet of you could be clinically described as "rude" or having "rude-like tendencies." This once-unspoken epidemic has been finally addressed by TV personality and soul peerer Oprah Winfrey, who has helped humankind help itself with a helpful quiz to determine chronic rudeness. As part of my civic duty to become more like a MySpace user, here are the results of my survey:
1. Are you chronically late?
Every month. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever menstruated on time.
2. Have you ever typed an e-mail while talking on the phone?
Only while driving.
3. Have you ever interrupted a face-to-face conversation to take a non-urgent cell phone call?
Using my telekinetic powers, I am able to deduce the nature and tone of the caller's message before my phone even rings. Given this, I'll always ... hold on, I might have to take this.
4. Have you gone through a supermarket 10-item express lane with more than 10 items?
I only shop at Wal-Mart, where the express checkout lines are, not 10, but 20 items or less. I also teach my children valuable lessons about manners by yelling at them in the toy department. I cut off other shoppers, waste time by standing in front of the milk aisle, and generally put other items back on shelves in which they are not supposed to be. But no, I never abuse the express lane privileges.
5. While among friends or co-workers, have you yawned without covering your mouth?
Article comments
1 - Robert M. Barga
Just wondering, but isn't Oprah's show just gossip?
2 - Joanne Huspek
Oh, my. This is hilarious.