Don't do everything blogger/columnist/book author John Scalzi says.
In response to a reader's query, Scalzi posted ten suggestions for nonprofessional writers who'd like to "write better." He offers a few good tips, such as "when in doubt, simplify" and "learn to friggin' spell," which really means "use the friggin' spell checker."
But he leaves out a couple of key guidelines, and his grammar and punctuation suggestions will create more chaos than they'll clear up.
What he forgets
Scalzi omits one absolutely vital guideline rule: Use the active voice. Instead of saying, "The running back was tackled by the linebacker," say, "The linebacker tackled the running back." The passive voice moves the actor (subject) away from the action (verb) and makes it seem like the whole world sits around waiting for something to happen.
More tips:
Use simple, strong verbs (not simple, weak ones, like "use"). For example, instead of saying, "The linebacker tackled the running back," say, "The linebacker torpedoed the running back," or say, "The linebacker flattened the running back." Vivid verbs appeal to the reader's senses and help make sentences more memorable. (A little alliteration doesn't hurt, either.)
Sleep on it. In these days of blogging, breaking news, and instant gratification, it's hard to give our writing what it probably needs the most: time. Before you publish, try to put your piece down and come back to it a day or two later. You'll end up thinking about the piece while you're away from it, and when you come back, you'll look at it with a fresh eye.
Get feedback from at least two people. One, a member of your target audience and the other, a more experienced writer than you. Unless you're Emily Dickinson, you shouldn't write in a vacuum. During the drafting stage, a reader's impressions or another writer's advice can help you shape your piece or even take it in a new direction. Post-publish comments on your blog may provide some insight, but when people know you're looking for help while you're still writing, their feedback tends to be far more constructive.
What he nails
When he says:
Front-load your point: If you make people wade through seven paragraphs of unrelated anecdotes before you get to what you're really trying to say, you've lost....Now, sometimes people write to find out what their point is; I think that's fine because I do that myself. But most of the time after I've figured out my point, I'll go back and re-write.
That's like the old rule of thumb that recommends writing your article and then, when you think it's finished, deleting the first paragraph.
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Mark Saleski
...If you make people wade through seven paragraphs of unrelated anecdotes before you get to what you're really trying to say, you've lost.
my, oh my, i am so totally screwed!
2 - Victor Lana
Lori,
Having taught freshman English for many years (as well as high school English and 7 & 8 grade English), I'd say this post is right on the money. It should be read by writers (in college or not).
3 - Trinket
Thank you several times over. I know I can edit a piece several times and still find something that can be sharper. Walking away or sleeping on it if you can, is probably the best advice I've ever been given. Mistakes really jump out then.
4 - Natalie Davis
This was awesome, awesome, awesome.
5 - swingingpuss
Thanks for the pointers lori. Being a porn writer I have realized that nothing puts the fire out faster than a spelling or a grammatical mistake.
6 - Aaman
Excellent post - it has been cross-posted to Desicritics.org, for greater appreciation and adulation - check there too for comments.
7 - MrGrinch
I haven't read the original so if I mention something that was in the original article then my bad.
I wholeheartedly agree with your points and have an additional observation/piece of advice for aspiring amateur writers.
The goal of writing is to have somebody read your stuff. To make it easier on your reader, you will want to pay attention to the aesthetic of your writing, how it looks and flows.
The easiest way to do that is to keep your paragraphs in small, bitesize chunks and avoid superparagraphs as much as possible. This makes the writing less intimidating at first glance.
You will also want to speed up your sentences as much as possible. Keep your commas to a minimum if you can and above all else, omit needless words.
8 - levee
Interesting post, and thanks for pointing me to the other resource by Scalzi. Definitely food for thought!
9 - Laurie Cheers
IMO, the best advice for improving your writing and punctuation is to read lots (of well written and punctuated prose), not to learn rules. That's the natural way; that's how you learn language in the first place.
10 - Jimmie
Ham. Johnnie Walker. That was a very helpful article.
11 - Shrikant Joshi
Strange. Your Comment policy says that Personal attacks are not allowed.
Yet, that is exactly what you seem to have indulged in, with this post.
Let me clarify at the outset that nothing, absolutely nothing, is wrong with your post. It makes perfect sense. But personally, I feel, you may have gone a little overboard with your critique on Scalzi. I have read the post before you wrote about it and i found it pretty good for non-writer...
Come to think about it, hasn't Scalzi mentioned right at the outset that the post is for non-writers? Why the venom, fella?
12 - John Cox
I had my eyebrows up in anticipation of using a semicolon when I read Mr. Scalzi's article as well. While I am not a very refined writer, I did recall the rules for the semicolons from the little time that I paid attention in High School English.
Nice article, and thanks for the clarifications.
13 - Guesty
I agree with the grammar aspects of this post; I really do. ;)
But with the "What he forgets" section, I disagree. A blog should not be altered to make it sound more dramatic or memorable. I think a blog should give the facts, as opposed to using catchy words or phrases to make the blog sound more interesting than it actually is.
14 - Sage
I'd say there are really only two rules, and Scalzi gets them in numbers 7 and 8:
1. Treat every time you write anything--email, notes in class, anything--as a chance to improve your writing skills. (And of course, write a lot.)
2. Read good writers. All the time. Pay attention to how they use the written word, what elements stand out, how they structure sentences, everything. It doesn't matter if you're reading fiction and writing nonfiction; studying effective prose gives you a chance not just to learn "rules", but to understand why to follow them (or not).
15 - Elvira Black
Great piece, and good takeoff on Scalzi's post.
I think Scalzi was doing a somewhat tongue in cheek, quick and dirty post aimed at "non-writers" who don't want to look totally foolish in their day to day writing. But I feel that even those who have no aspirations for being a noted author would find your piece and his to be useful.
When I see even a comment or e-mail that is carelessly thought out with gross mispellings, many times I find it hard to take the writer all that seriously. That goes double for those who sometimes make me scratch my head because I can't even figure out what side of the fence they're sitting on, because they don't make it clear except in their own head. Seems to me it's a good idea for any writer in any medium to try and get some of the basic rules nailed down--and to PROOFREAD before hitting "send."
I do think that if one is a voracious reader, it is possible to learn most of the "rules" intuitively by observing others. And I also think if one aspires to be a good writer, or a pro for that matter, reading others' writing is pretty much a prerequisite.
People can also "fall in love" with their own writing and be blind to the fact that it may need editing to make it more readable to others. As a much younger writer, I remember how I used to try to load my prose with big words and long ponderous sentences. This was fine for academic treatises, but not if you want the average person to sit up and pay attention. Knowing "le mot juste," however, can be very valuable as long as it's used judiciously.
Thanks for the great post.
16 - Brad Root
It seems to be there are two camps of writers.
Those who write literature, and/or those who get books published, non-fiction or fiction.
And those who talk about writing.
Now Scalzi might not be the best candidate as the example of an author, but he's the best I got. His rules aren't flawless by any means, but they're certainly a lot easier to swallow than your nearly flaming piece here.
His rules are great, even if flawed, if only because the give you the best advice you can get. He tells you to read great writers, and to pretty much do as you please within reason. Anyone who has written fiction knows that pin-point precision to the rules is pointless. Your speaking voice isn't anywhere near grammatically correct. I don't think your writing voice should be either. But, again, within reason.
English is a constantly evolving language, and in no place has this been more apparent than in literature. Every author writes differently. They have their own rules. Some comma splice it up; some never use quotation marks when writing their dialog; some just slaughter the language with run on sentences that are all commas. (Was that proper usage of a semi-colon? I don't know, but it felt right.)
I'm deviating from my point, though I did front-load it.
There are those who talk about writing, they might teach it even. They're bogged down in the science of the language. They write stodgy papers full of rules, dos and don'ts about writing. They live a life almost completely devoid of creativity, and if they do write something in the realm of fiction, it's generally boring and stale. I hate to insult all English teachers in the world, but I find this holds true almost all the time.
The people who write, however, will more often than not tell you that writing is nothing more than doing what you feel is right. If you're a terrible writer, then don't write. If you're a great writer, well, there you go.
No amount of rules, hints, tips, guidelines, or inside out knowledge of sentence structure is going to make you a good writer.
... Course, if you're a terrible writer with a desire to dissect the language until you remove nearly all the joy out of it, then maybe you should look into writing guides on how to write properly.
17 - Brad Root
Oh, and, by the way, your advice to have a writer show someone else their work is the worst advice you can give anyone. At least you should specify that you should show someone when you are DONE with what you are working on.
Showing someone a work in progress is generally the greatest murderer of creativity. It depends on the writer, of course, and what you're writing. I'm talking mostly about fiction here. Every time I have shown a WIP to someone, I haven't been able to continue it.
18 - lori
Thanks for all the comments, everyone, and thanks for all the additional suggestions for people who want to improve their writing.
A couple of replies:
#11 Shrikant Joshi: I'm not a fella. 8-) But that's neither here nor there. Scalzi says he's responding to a query specifically about people who "aren't aspiring professionals but who would like to write better," not nonwriters. They're clearly writers, but they're not writing professionally. Also, Scalzi adds this nota bene: "These [the ten tips] work pretty well for people who do want to be pro writers, too."
Also, Shrikant, I've made no personal attacks against Scalzi. I critiqued his writing advice, and that's it. In that critique, I also said he offered some good tips.
Re: #16 and 17, Brad Root: I'm so sorry to have hurt your feelings by critiquing "the best guy you've got." Go ahead, insinuate all you want that I'm not really a writer myself if it makes you feel bigger. You make good points about the difference between fiction and nonfiction writing, but your approach makes anything you have to say pretty much disposable.
Also, I noticed you posted comment #16 on your own blog, but that you don't seem to allow others to comment there. (At least I couldn't find a link.) I'd like to note for the record that I never said, "Don't listen to John Scalzi." I said, "Don't listen to everything John Scalzi says." If you're going to quote me, please do so accurately.
19 - lori
Actually, I need to quote myself accurately. I said, "Don't do everything John Scalzi says."
20 - coolguy
tanks; now i can reely rite good!
21 - Deano
Interesting and well-written post Lori, but I would point out that you may be reading a bit too literally on the comma and breathing section. It is fairly clear from Scalzi's post that he is not suggesting you place a comma in your work everytime you breathe. He is suggesting that, if you were to read the sentence aloud, as though someone were speaking it, the comma would be placed at the pause points for the breath.
In the context of how he presents it, it is not a bad rule of thumb. Obviously it is not consistent or correct at all times or in all places, but it can give a non-professional writer a good take on when and where the usage of a comma may be called for, without consulting a grammar nazi for advice.
Otherwise I thought both Lori and Scalzi have provided some excellent advice.
22 - John Scalzi
Relax, folks -- she's not attacking me personally, she's merely disagreeing with some advice I gave.
Now, I do believe Ms. Mortimer misinterpreted the primary audience for the piece. In fact I did aim it at non-writers, which is why the title of the piece is "Writing Tips for Non-Writers Who Don't Want to Work at Writing" -- non-writers in this case being people who don't write for a living or as part of their living (filing reports, etc). I think the advice is applicable for pro writers and non-pros who write in the course of their work, but clearly one's mileage may vary. I also think that in her response to my advice she's neglecting a salient point, which is that my advice is aimed toward people who don't actually want to *work* at writing better, while hers clearly is.
I would also respectfully disagree that my punctuation and grammar advice will cause chaos (chaos!). They work just dandy for me, and I've been supporting myself as a writer for 15 years. I cop to being occasionally chaotic on a personal basis, but my writing usually works out just fine. I wouldn't tell non-writers to do something I wouldn't do, writing-wise; that would seem kind of mean.
Having said that, I find her advice here to be generally good and sensible, so if you *do* wish to work on your writing -- which, to be clear, I think would be a good thing -- then you should listen up to what she says. If you just want to give the *appearance* of working on your writing, then I expect my advice will do well enough... although again, your mileage may vary.
23 - Phillip Winn
Good to see you around, Scalzi!
It should be noted that John Scalzi is responsible for article #1 on this site: a review of an album by a band called Dorman.
24 - Justin
Nice work, Lori. It's refreshing to come across proof that there are still some people who care about proper grammar, punctuation, and the like. Bravo!
25 - Deano
You can also find a review of his book Old Man's War at http://blogcritics.org/archives/2005/11/06/231914.php.