Life is full of those classic questions meant to haunt us until we discover the answers; for example, how do we know the difference between good and evil, what is our purpose on earth, and, most frequently, how do we plan to change the world? There seems to be a nationwide obsession with the latter question in particular, as well as a sense of inherent moral benefit in asking it.
That question, like so many others, was answered for me more simply than I expected, and through the influence of Mother Teresa and one college professor.
Not only was my high school a college preparatory school, it was Christian. Between these two distinctions, you can imagine how often I thought, and was asked to think, about how I would someday “change the world.”
Honestly, it bothered me each time I heard it. I felt as if there were a Platonic obligation for myself – and all of my peers – to pursue political leadership for the benefit of the masses. Otherwise, we had to become famous enough in whatever random profession we chose that we could utilize our positions of power.
Realistically, I thought, most of us will become teachers or pharmacists or engineers, and that’s if we’re lucky. I wondered if that meant we didn’t have an equal opportunity to make a difference. The idea disturbed me.
Even after graduating, I couldn’t escape. Every scholarship or college entrance essay I wrote was a variant on the same question. Daunted, I began to pursue a degree with the end of being a wealthy, high-powered, and well-known investigative journalist in mind. I understood it was idealistic, perhaps unrealistic, but I didn’t want to waste my life. I wasn’t sure how to go about avoiding that except to be idealistic; adults had implied that to me for the last four years.
I knew there were those who accomplished the steady climb into influence and renown, like President Obama, and made good use that boon. I also knew I was no Obama. I didn’t want power or position, but I did want to do something to help a broken world of broken people.
With this in mind, during my freshman year of college, I was surprised to meet the man I would marry. I had, amusingly, planned out my next ten years in my subconscious, including where and when I would meet my spouse. I imagined we would both be embedded journalists in the Middle East, ducking behind military jeeps, dodging bullets, and writing of our adventures together (at this point, I think it’s safe to say I was being idealistic and unrealistic).
Article comments
1 - Christine
Hey Jaimie, very moving piece and one of my role models is Mother Teresa!!!!!!!
Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.
I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.
I do not pray for success, I ask for faithfulness.
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.
Mother Teresa
PS: I have only been writing for a year or so and mainly diet books. BUT I remember writing my first political article here on BC back in May 08, and being devastated by some of the comments! I still cringe after EVERY article...but at the end of the day, I keep writing!!
2 - Ruvy
Jaimie,
I don't know a lot of your ideas - and get the feeling I would disagree with many of them. No matter. If you want to write, you need to be willing to fight. There are all sorts of idiots out there and there are people who will disagree with you and try to tear you apart. Sometimes, but not all the time, the two will overlap. The act of your professor - the basic act of nurturing a developing writer - was not only his job, but what he is happy to do as a writer himself. I was taught the craft of writing by such a person myself. Do that to other writers - and you will have continued in your professor's path. But in addition to that, you have your won path to tread.
Keep writing.