Lindsay Lohan's vagina is all the rage these days. First it got its very own name, "Firecrotch," as dubbed by the "Greasy Bear" oil heir Brandon Davis during a now infamous rant in the company of a tittering Paris Hilton.
As if the public hadn't had enough of "Firecrotch" in both name and spirit, Lindsay has now twice in as many weeks revealed not a "fire-crotch" but rather a shaved and saggy hooch to the press, her adoring fans, frightened fauna, and future generations who will sadly ponder what the hell was wrong with their ancestors.
F
irst, numerous sites popped up with photos of Lindsay stepping out of a boat in Venice to promote her new movie Bobby, which clearly show Lindsay loaded for bare.
The Lilo bald eagle was bad enough, but then her agents were exposed attempting a photo-doctoring cover-up, which generated as much outrage as the initial peek at her naughty bits.
Subsequent photos with poorly photoshopped undies in place helped create enough air of confusion as to question which was real and which was fake. Celeb gossip site, The Superficial did some digging and determined that the original from the photo agency with Lohan's high-and-tight exposed was the real deal.
For you pervs, here's a close up of the nation's treasure.
Fast forward a week and a new locale, this time London, and Lindsay is again spotted completely unaware of the draftiness about her nether regions. The photo at right has been sanitized for your protection. The real deal is a staggeringly stark close up shot of her Brazilian, and the detail is spectacular and undeniably Lohan (not for the weak of constitution).
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Michele
They must have holes elsewhere too.
They are so gross!
2 - Eric Olsen
I see readers are stunned into silence by the ickyness of it all - not all news is pretty
3 - Mark Saleski
i woulda never thought that i'd be repulsed by a woman going commando. dang.
4 - Eric Olsen
that extreme shaving thing is most unappealing, like a recovering surgery patient or something
5 - Dawn
For being such young women, their vjj's are looking a bit haggard. I would hate to see those pups after a couple of vaginal deliveries - of children that is.
I am sorry I even had to bring all this to the attention of our lovely BC readers, but dammit - someone has to do the dirty work.
6 - Steve C.
I'll bet someone could put together a PowerPoint presentation featuring those two Hay Nanny Nannies. It'd work along the lines of those WWII VD videos -- shock the kids into good behavior. "Now girls, this is what you'll look like if you give it up to everyone with a penis and a handful of peanuts!"
Imagine what horrors their nethers will hold in another twenty years. Yecch. Can you say "prolapsed"?
7 - DJRadiohead
Sweet Matilda's hymen- oh, wait... I can see how that would be a poor turn of phrase in light of...This is your vjj on drugs...
8 - Eric Berlin
You had me at "Lindsay Lohan's vagina is all the rage these days," Dawn!
PS - Who came up with "vjj" ?
9 - Mark Saleski
i really hope something like this doesn't happen with scarlett johansson....because, like, i'd hate to see the damage it would do to pwinn.
10 - Eric Olsen
God made pubic hair and underwear for a reason
11 - Mark Saleski
to protect pwinn?
12 - DJRadiohead
I am sure that was His reason, Sir Saleski.
13 - Eric Olsen
I'm not sure how I feel about the glamorized version of Scarlett - in some ways I prefer the frumpy version
14 - Dawn
Who came up with vjj? That's like asking who invented the internets - I mean who can really say who invented the internet?
Okay, I borrowed it, but I get credit for recognizing it's relevance right?
15 - Eric Olsen
you're an assimilator, Dawn
16 - Jet in Columbus
Dawn's a Borg?... Resistance is futile?
17 - DJRadiohead
That second Lindsay photo should have the caption, "Turn and cough" or something.
18 - Joan Hunt
va-jay-jay was, I believe, most recently used on Grey's Anatomy by the Nazi. It was actually quite funny coming from her mouth.
What's not funny is this current bunch of young women running around flashing their goods like they have to prove they have, um, them. I don't get it. I think it's the "I wanna be an adult film star" craze, but who knows?
19 - STM
This is the best story on here all week.
An absolute fuc.ing classic.
20 - Dawn
I think you might be on to something Joan. There's always the doubt that they don't have
V-unit - and then what purpose would either of them have for existing?
Those two give vaginas a bad name.
21 - Victor Lana
Dawn, it's obvious these two nut-jobs have holes in their heads as well as their, uhm, wardrobe.
22 - bree
Okay, hang on a sec. What's up with calling the aforementioned va-jay-jays "saggy" or "haggard" or, ecch, "prolapsed"?
Lovely labia come in all shapes and sizes - innies and outies, if you will. It has nothing to do with activity level - you're just born that way.
Please, can we not give the girls of America one more thing to be horribly insecure about?
But the shaving? Is so unnatural and wrong. And uglifying.
23 - Mohjho
HAHAHAHHAAHAHA..."vjj"...heheheehhe...oh my..
24 - STM
What's wrong with calling the aforementioned va-jay-jays vaginas, the same as my 11-year-old does?
Immediately followed by incessant tittering.
25 - kensaku
I totally understand all points made by the author, but she presumes acceptance of "standards" which are completely arbitrary. Too many hot summer days have I wished I could walk around naked. It makes sense. Maybe some sandals to protect my feet, clothes if I'm operating machinery or something, but really, and I mean completely and absolutely, being naked (or partly) is only bad because you say it is.