Dear Elsa,
I am a Libra in love with a Virgo man. We have such a strong connection. I thought everything was going great until he turned around and said that we lived too far apart (1.5 hours) and it would never work.
I am so upset because things were so good and fantastic between us, but he said it was too difficult being so far apart. I asked why not give it a chance and see, and he said he was already attached and didn’t want to get more attached and hurt. I haven’t called him, even though I really want to, but I figure he would call me if he was interested.
Should I move on and see what else is out there...or just keep pining for a love it seems I can’t have??
Libra in Love
Dear Libra,
Well I suppose you’ll move on eventually, yes? Because he’s not coming to you, nor is he asking you to come to him. So really, it’s like the whole team has gone home and you’re still standing there on the mound, wondering.
Well, apparently you’re wondering how he could opt out when everything was so grand and here is the little bit you’re missing. It wasn’t grand for him! It was whatever it was, but it was not "good and fantastic” as you describe it, at least not from his perspective. And looking in this direction will lead you to the door out.
Instead on going on and on in your mind, pining for this great thing you lost, try to stand in his shoes. Try to hear what he is telling you – if not in words, then by the choice he’s made. Your relationship was something to him, but not enough for him to want to continue to invest.
And don’t miss the important thing here, which is this: your reality of something is not necessarily going to jibe with another person’s read on things. You have Venus conjunct Neptune in your chart…famous for pining, but this is another manifestation of the same aspect. That is, fantasizing/blurring the loved one to such a degree you have no idea who they are and how they feel.
I imagine this hurts, and I’m sorry about that. But from a fellow Venus Neptune who’s learned the hard way, I can tell you for sure you will have to look at these tendencies at some point – if you want to be part of a relationship that is actually “good and fantastic”…for both parties.
Good luck.
Article comments
1 - nyjah
whoa!this is scary..im a libra too with venus neptune and dating a Fine Virgo man im gonna have to watch out for him!i know you will find someone who deserves you...just give it time
2 - Lee-Alle
I'm inlove with a libra guy.We love each other dearly,it's been three weeks now since we have been dating
Is it going to last?
3 - juicycout
im a virgo woman. was dating with a libra man..i never felt comfortable in the relationship and when he told me he was in love i couldn't feel the same way back, he represented the ideal man for me on many accounts but the feeling was just not there. now its over i believe i shared some great memories with him..got a little too attached but cannot ever say it was love.
4 - miss stephanie
I am as well a Virgo lady and am dating a Libra man. We have been on and off for about a year now. Many times where I felt uncomfortable and confused, I left him and of course he wanted me back; there was something about him that made me appreciate him more. There have been many times that I felt like I was forcing myself to say that I loved him but deep down I loved him no matter what. It is short-lived if both parties give up emotionally to make it work but like my guy and I, it will work if you are both passionate about being with each other.
5 - Eddy
I'm a capricorn dude with a taurus rising and a pisces moon. I was just wondering...what advantages and disadvantages does this give me in life? Which signs should I try to bring out more and which should I bring out less? Just a question I've been pondering
6 - ms pretty
I'm a virgo woman dating a libra man and i find that libras are very superficial and vein and they are insecure and childish they make hasty decisions without thinking and are easily persuaded by others I'm the virgo and im 29 he's the libra and he's 28 maybe its this way because he's young but on the other end he can be sweet .
7 - libra gurl
wel i am a libra gurl, not woman. and i am in love with this virgo. the problem is...we dont hav our connection anymore and i dont kno y. we still talk and we are good friends but i still want him but i feel like he isn't in love wit me. i dont want to be with a guy tht i have the strongest feelings for but does not have the feelings for me also....but strangely i want to be with him
and mind you, he has broken my heart because he cheated on me 3 times but me, love stricken, forgave him and stayed with him...do i keep trying to get back with him in hopes tht i could bring back our once flaming connection or should i just continue just being friends even though i cannot stop thinking about him day and nite and i cry over him and go into deep depression...
another problem....if i stop trying, it'll kill me to kno that i cant do anything. i will become into a deeper depression...but wats the rite thing to do?
can someone help? and as u kno, us libra's are very undecidable.
8 - Cindy
libra,
i dont want to be with a guy tht i have the strongest feelings for but does not have the feelings for me also...
smart girl. reading what you wrote i think you know the answer yourself about what the right thing is for you. it doesn't say anything about us when another person doesn't feel for us, you know. it doesn't mean we aren't wonderful or lovable.
but strangely i want to be with him
our hearts are not always as smart as our heads. and though it might seem impossible to get over, all us girls have done it and you can do it too. soon enough you may even wonder what you saw in him. sometimes what we see in someone comes more from what we need than what they actually are or have to offer. turn to your friends. put your attention on other things. things do get better. we all go through this. it will be okay. :-)
9 - Autumn
libra and virgo is able to fall in love very quickly and it is an amazing relationship in the beginning. However, both will find that there are far too many incompatibilities to make each one happy.