Kevin Costner isn't dancing with wolves anymore — now he's spanking with monkeys and/or choking with chicken.
In what has to be high on the list of most bizarre acts of celebrity audacity, it was revealed this week that Kevin Coster stands accused of taking off his towel, then taking liberties with himself during a massage while honeymooning with his new wife in Scotland in October of '04.
According to the 34-year-old female masseuse in question, "It was disgusting and, even though he was a Hollywood superstar, I couldn’t believe he thought he could get away with something like that," she said. She went on to say,"Kevin Costner abused me and I considered that a criminal act."
I know honey, I felt the same way after watching Waterworld and The Postman.
After complaining to management about the alleged autoerotica, things quickly deteriorated for the woman: she wasn't offered counseling (the horror) and claims she was later unfairly dismissed because of her complaint and the results of post-traumatic stress. Costner is understood to be good friends with the owners of the posh Old Course Hotel in St Andrews, where the alleged monkey spank took place.
Just before her dismissal hearing was due to start today, the woman — Who Cannot Be Named — settled out of court for an undisclosed sum.
In all seriousness, that is totally uncool and foul. I remember getting on the highway once and noticing a car facing the opposite direction. The driver seemed to be flagging me down; as I approached I slowed down to see if he needed help only to find him with his junk all hanging out in full glory.
I, too, was startled, disgusted and felt violated. At least in my case, I wasn't forced to sit there and watch the grimacing and contorting as he acheived shangri-la.
All I can say is thank goodness it wasn't Sting: hell with all his yoga and tantric sex moves, there might have been more going on than a little manhandling.
Kevin Coster, perv, ewww....
Article comments
1 - sal m
To Paraphrase A Past Post:
I suppose it's way more classy to come online and bash people you don't even know and label them trailer park trash - um or as masterbating perverts - and disgusting pieces of crap.
If that's class, I don't want any.
We should let these masterbating celebs self-pleasure when and whereever they please...after all, we're just here in the way of their lives.
;)
2 - Andy Marsh
Dawn - that was you that drove by me that day???
Sorry!
Something must be wrong with me...I liked Waterworld...
3 - Eric Olsen
"excuse me while I whip this out"
4 - Matthew T. Sussman
He's just a drifter who found a bag of male.
5 - sal m
here's the best line from the article that is linked above.
"The woman said that she was sacked last August."
is she referring to kevin or to being fired?
6 - Dawn
Guys, seriously, you're killing me!!
7 - Guppusmaximus
So, Is this what they meant when they said,"If you build it they will come(cum)"? I've seen the movie on VHS, so I didn't have subtitles to see how they spelled come! I thought "it" was a baseball field...I mean WTF. Sure, if my girlfriend "Builds it" I almost always cum...(eeww, TMI...lmfao)
8 - Ruvy in Jerusalem
So, in other Kevin Costner can still get it up - a woman saw this fact and sued him - and she got paid for it.
Cool! What a way to make money!
9 - Eric Olsen
he was only 49 at the time - not necessarily cause for self-handling celebration
10 - Elvira Black
Hmmm. let's see....
On his honeymoon no less, he allegedly has to get his jollies with/on another woman on the massage table. Doesn't bode well, does it?
11 - Eric Olsen
strikes me as impetuous
12 - MCH
"All I can say is thank goodness is wasn't Sting: hell with all his yoga and tantric sex moves, there might have been more going on than a little manhandling."
But, doesn't your hubby look a little bit like Sting...?
13 - Eric Olsen
all but the untold riches and tantric part
14 - IgnatiusReilly
never seen "monkeys" spelled that way. Is their an inside joke or movie reference I'm missing?
15 - Nancy
I second #14: I got the implication that it's the male appendage they're talking about, but where did that reference come from?
16 - saeed
its terrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrifice.
17 - Amy J.
How do we know it's true? After all he's rich and she got money out of it right? God I hope it's not true .
18 - Amy J.
How do we know it's true? After all he's rich and she got money out of it right? God I hope it's not true .