There is something ironic and sad about a reality TV series predicated upon your lifelong commitment to a person, only to have it end after three years. I have cans in my pantry longer than Nick and Jessica were married. Such is the world of celebrity lovers turned litigants; now all that remains is the quest for who gets to keep the bounty of their union - a bounty that would otherwise be much smaller if not for the sum total of that union.
If having only $7 million makes you poor, Nick Lachey is about to file for celebrity welfare. According to reports "close to the source" (read TMZ - the omnipresent stalkerazzi) Jessica Simpson's, 25, is offering ex-husband Nick Lachey, 31, a measly $1.5 million to settle their division of property, stating that he "doesn't have the stomach to sue" her.
That's $28.5 million less than the couple was worth before their divorce: Nick, get some antacid for crissakes. California law states that Nick, a former 98 Degrees member, is entitled to receive half of the couple's assets, but the ruthless Simpson conglomerate run by Papa Joe Simpson (father of Jessica and Ashlee) are counting on Nick taking a cool $1.5 million to avoid having to seek spousal support, and the oppressive strong-arm tactics of his soon to be former father-in-law.
Poor Nick, still reportedly in love with the curvaceous but dimwitted Jessica, is clearly wounded. Proving that bad luck is good publicity - the divorce, his heartache and her cruelty are fueling his re-emergence as a popstar with his hit single "What's Left Of Me," a bittersweet tale of love gone wrong. The single, peaking at #6 on Billboard's Hot 100, from his second solo album, also titled What's Left Of Me, sold a whopping 170,000 in its debut week of May 27. I am certainly no pop music fanatic, but I like the single and it's all the more engaging knowing the well-publicized backstory of the song. 
Nick and Jessica became stars after their reality TV series on MTV, The Newlyweds, catapulted the couple to fame - a fame that they might not otherwise have known. The intrusiveness of the show and the world into the fledgling marriage, endless tabloid speculation, and ultimately, the puppeteering of father/manager Joe Simpson clearly contributed to the disintegration of the three-year marriage. Joe Simpson, mastermind of The Newlyweds, is also owner and founder of Papa Joe records, securely nestled under the Geffen label.
Article comments
1 - Eric Olsen
excellent job on this Dawn! Very glad to see things are working out for Nick, who seems like a good guy
2 - DJRadiohead
Dawn, we have our topic. Damn, I'm going to enjoy the shit out of this.
3 - Dawn
DJR - I look forward to it. Hopefully the barfing disease that hasn't shrouded the Olsen household doesn't get me before then.
See what happens when you cross Joe Simpson, you puts a plague upon your house.
4 - DJRadiohead
Joe Simpson is a terrible and powerful man. From their line, the antiChrist may well spawn.
5 - Michael J. West
The article was excellent, but the title was transcendent.
6 - Guppusmaximus
LOL... This stuff is good. It's a Soap Opera with a Soundtrack. I should've given up on integrity in music and pawned my soul to the devil...F*CK!
Looks like I will only have the good stuff to listen to when I'm old and grey.
7 - Dawn
That should read "has shrouded" - I think I am succumbing to the plague. Curse you Joe Simpson, or should I say, the Dark One.
8 - Eric Olsen
he clearly has unnatural influence over time and space
9 - Eric Berlin
I'm waiting patiently for The Newly Divorced -- it's got to be coming soon.
It does look like this is a case where Nick deserves and is winning the PR battle.
10 - Chelsea Snyder
WHAT?! NICK AND JESSICA GOT MARRIED?
11 - Nancy Glass
I would love to be able to get a message to Jessica. I feel very deeply that this divorce.. either about to happen or already in the past is such a HUGE HORRIBLE mistake. Nick is head over heals and he loves her to death. I don't think that it will give her more fame, and if it does only for a short time, and then just sadness, and unhappiness. I was married the exact same day... October 26, 2002; and I do understand. I would earge her to put away pride which can be the death of any marriage, and try to salvage what is left with councelling, books, and whatnot. I just think shes going to be extreemly disappointed ten years from now when she realizes that no other man loved her the way Nick did, and life didn't quite work out the way she expected.
12 - Blackpearl 88
uhuhuhu.. im soOOoo sad of the break up.. nick and jess make a perfect couple together but what happened...?? uhuhuhu i love you nIck one day the right girl for you will come too.. you've been good and damn handsOme.. to hell with the girls who betrayed you..!!! they are unreasonable.. oneday you'll find the the one who will love you sincerely and truly... lOve you nick!.. to jessica,though i love your pairing and the chemistry you had, after what you've done to nick, i wish you luck in finding hapiness..no man would love you as nick did to you.. realize that!! it's your lost... you had hurted him already and i HATE you for that..! nick, keep up the good work...