Inside the TSA

My home blog covers all sorts of topics- everything from geopolitics to Wal-Mart is fair game. For whatever reason I've never become widely read in blogland so I get most of my traffic via Google. Makes me feel like I'm talking to more than just the folks in the blogsphere.

So what is my #1 traffic generating topic? How to get a job at the TSA. That is Transportation Security Administration to the acronym challenged. When Eric requested "Everybody Blog!" (which sound like some 1960's Austin Powers dance commandment) I decided to publish my TSA experience.

You've read all the blogs about bad security. You've read Mr. Instapundit's Fox News columns. Now here is the "inside story".

Man that sounds like something from that old Current Affair show.

I've been looking for some permanent employment since around the start of the year. The economy here in Silicon Valley smells worse than Alviso, which any good Silicon Valley resident knows is the location of the dump and the sewage plant. The current unemployment rate in Santa Clara County is 7.6%. And there are very few job openings. After months of getting nowhere my strategy evolved to include a possible move back to Southern California. The economy is hotter there. I have friends and family there. But it is hard to get a job long distance.

I did not want to bet the farm on one avenue, so besides the usual job hunting techniques I decided to watch for the TSA hiring at Southern California airports. I figured if all else failed I could get the security job, move, and keep hunting for something I'd rather do. When the opening posted I applied. This began a long hurry up and wait encounter with our Federal Government. Over the next couple of posts I'll walk you through what happened to me and what I think it all means for security and the future of the airlines.

First some ground rules. Part of the process involved an NDA. So there are some things I will not talk about. For example, I can not discuss specifics about the various assessment tests. So if you are wondering about what to bone up on if you want to be a security screener don't ask me. If I find out something I've written about is verboten it is coming down. I had considered doing an anonymous blog about all this but it isn't worth the bother and I don't need that den Beste guy on my butt (just kidding- I like his stuff).

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  • 1 - Shannon

    Sep 28, 2002 at 4:28 pm

    I'm currently temping for the TSA deployment at Logan here in Boston...oy, the stories I could tell. But as Ken Layne thoughtfully noted in the comments on my site, why get fired? (The economy is hellish here, too).

    I do "admin support" for the federal screeners (what Chris wants to be)...there are bits and pieces about it on my site, but for humor value, go here http://www.bitter-girl.com/2002_09_01_blogarchive.html#001068 and follow the links...

    By the way, the screening process for us was much less rigorous. We were all asked these 3 questions:

    1. Can you start Wednesday?
    2. What's your shirt size?
    3. Are you breathing? (ok, just kidding on that, but in some cases, you'd wonder...)

  • 2 - Hell No!

    Sep 28, 2003 at 12:10 am

    Hell No!

    I’ve been mildly amused to watch the evolution of so-called “security measures” at our nation’s airports. While I do not fly too often, I am inevitably singled-out for special attention by TSA. Those security personnel tell me that it’s “nothing personal” and that the airline has identified me as a “security risk”.

    A basic standard in the United States governs search and seizure. That standard requires the police to have “probably cause”. Indisputably, that standard is NOT met by the procedures employed by TSA and the airlines. Of course, the fact that the airlines are allegedly involved in identifying suspects provides the purported justification for the TSA’s unconstitutional invasion of our privacy. No law allows common carriers to search their customers without cause. Similarly, the Fed’s cannot search without reasonable cause. Thus, an obvious conclusion is that the unholy alliance between airlines and TSA is intentionally designed to evade Constitutional prohibitions and invade our personal privacy.

    Some of the “risk factors” that triggered special attention by TSA and the airlines include:

    • Searching the Internet for cheap fares by holding one flight, then purchasing a different flight.

    • Flying round trip by using two one way tickets.

    • Approaching the ticket counter about a delayed flight, and then looking for an earlier flight instead of checking-in.

    I have also been troubled by the ridiculous attention paid to my feet during these intensive security exams. While the TSA justifies ALL invasions of personal privacy by reference to “public safety”, I must now question these impositions. Keep in mind that the United States is targeted for terror because it is free, tolerant and prosperous. The roots of our success lie in the prescience of our forefathers. They created a social and political structure that permits each individual to compete and succeed based on their innate faculties. This precept is discussed in the Federalist Papers and I believe it provides the very foundation of a liberal democracy.

    In contrast, fear, suffering and coercion provide the basis for virtually all of the world’s political and economic systems. With precious few exceptions, even our allies maintain repressive political and economic regimes. While this situation may have been accepted as a “fact-of-life” during Gun Boat Diplomacy, its long been time for the United States to demand that our economic allies institute democratic reforms. The absurdity of this situation permits our continued support of oppressive regimes like Saudi Arabia, Japan, India, Indonesia, and too many others to name.

    We barter with the devil then wonder why our eyebrows are singed!

    In this regard, TSA inspectors have been specially trained in the use of the “wand” to probe the feet of suspects. I’ve never seen anyone but “white bread” males receiving this treatment and I find myself wondering about the purpose of this procedure. Are they searching for explosive laden prosthetics, or did some federal freak with a foot fetish impose this absurd state of affairs.

    Just today I arrived at an airport on a connecting flight to my destination. I asked the airline to put me on the earlier flight and was told that “standby” is no longer permitted when a flight is sold out. I thought this peculiar and asked what the airline did if they had empty seats. The response from the counter and from the airline’s toll-free reservation number was that it would “assume the risk” of empty seats.

    Needless to say, that response struck me as counterintuitive coming from an industry plagued by bankruptcies and a severe curtailment in business since the tragic events of 911. No one flies “empty”. So what’s going on? Well, I am forced to conclude that the airlines - aided by federal bailout funds, aka, our tax dollars, are using this so-called security crisis to “stabilize” competition. What’s to be gained if the airlines eliminate standby, curtail our ability to shop for cheaper fares and prevent us from changing airlines when they experience so-called “mechanical difficulties.” More profits for the airlines, less choices for us and all of us afraid to complain about the lousy service for fear of being strip searched.

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