I've wondered why a lot of the women I've met recently were unable to be honest with me. I showed them my interest with both words and actions. I'm not one to shy away from making the effort; I don't heed blindly the advice of modern magazines geared towards men. Swingers to me is a funny film with advice you laugh at rather than follow. The principles I glean from that film and the subculture of man-power (treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen, cocky-funny) empower me more as a man: respect yourself, don't be clingy, have your own life, develop a strong personality, develop your life separate from the affirmation of a woman.
That last one hits home deeply. That, I've done. I have respected myself more lately, more this year than any other year. I've put my foot down, not accepted the things that the girls did, cut the cord, and moved on. But you're left with that hole inside and not knowing what to do with it. Women still lie to me. Women still make up crap to keep me sweet. Women still will do everything, even as far as to delude me, to avoid telling me flat-out that they're not interested. And I don't get it.
I said earlier that I haven't been able to figure out why women I'm interested in weren't honest with me. That takes me to a central truism to which many women subscribe: I don't want to hurt his feelings.
I see this truism stemming from three immovable perceptions in the minds of women. First, men are weak, emotionally frail, and driven purely by their pride. Second, the most important thing to achieve out of a situation is a simple, painless ending or dissolution. Finally, it's a woman's prerogative to choose whom she wants.
I don't want to hurt his feelings. This is essentially deception. Letting down a guy easy by giving him a staid reason for why things won't work out is dishonest. And it's demeaning to a guy to think that he can't handle the real reasons. How much more demeaning is it that women assume all men want to live in blissful ignorance in order to not to feel humiliated.
I don't want to hurt his feelings. The most important thing to achieve from a situation is for both parties to move on. Make it simple and painless after you've come clean. I find women whom can't confront the reality that they don't want to date you anymore to be cowards. They're cowards who, in wanting this "painless" ending, are sadly protected by a like-minded society. "Take care of you, girl." "You deserve so much better." "You did the right thing, it's your choice!"