San Antonio (Rotters News) - For 44 year old San Antonio resident Rosa Gonzalez, Easter is a significant time; like other devout Catholics, she celebrates the scourging, crucifixion, and resurrection of Jesus Christ with masses, prayers, candles, pastel M&Ms, other special candies that can only be found once a year.
Yesterday was like any other Palm Sunday; early Mass, followed by a stop at the local Wal-Mart to pick up a few seasonal sweets. Her favorite candy is a special marshmallow, sugar-coated confectionary called "Peeps".
These incredibly bright yellow candies are shaped like little baby chicks, and have a sugar content — Rosa will be happy to inform you — of no more than a large glass of orange juice.
At the Wal-Mart, Rosa bought her usual supply of Peeps, a few bags of pastel M&Ms, and a large hollow chocolate bunny for each of her three children. On her way home, Gonzalez decided to open a package of Peeps to test their freshness. (Sometimes — because of their seasonal appeal — last year's Peeps inventory can make it to this years shelves.) Before taking her first bite, Gonzalez was lucky enough to glance at the Peep; what she saw almost caused her to faint: in the center of the Peep was an image of Christ that closely resembled the one from the famous "Shroud of Turin".
Gonzalez called her priest, Father Damian Fuente, who agreed to meet her at her house. Meanwhile, Gonzalez also called a number of local news organizations and invited them to see her 'miracle'.
When reporters arrived, she and Fuente had already enshrined the Peep in a special cabinet that originally held her Beanie Baby collection; it had a place of prominence in her living room, just above her TV set. Throngs of stunned, reverent neighbors filled the house and yard. The news spread by word-of-mouth throughout the neighborhood, and with the arrival of the TV crews and their remote broadcast vans, the street quickly became clogged and impassable.
Article comments
1 - Chris Kent
Absolutely hilarious. Since there's been no peep from the Pope, what about Wal-Mart? - an equally powerful entity....
2 - bhw
Peeps are the BEST. It's all I can do not to buy them in every color and down them before they make it to the kids' baskets.
I've eaten a lot of peeps in my day, but never once have I seen Jesus or his likeness before, during, or after eating them. I must not really *believe*.
3 - ClubhouseCancer
I believe in the infallability of the peep.
4 - Mark Saleski
ah, the power of peeps.
check out this site.
the guy makes artwork out of peeps.
5 - bhw
But how do you account for all the variations in the peep family? I mean, first we had the simple yellow chickadee peep. Times were so pure and wholesome then.
Now we have *lavender* peeps -- even lavender bunny peeps! I mean, is lavender not the favorite color of homosexuals? [See Donny Osmond and the purple Teletubby.] And aren't bunnies known for, um, fertility?
So aren't peeps now promoting promiscuous, lascivious homosexual behavior?! At EASTER? Even the pagans weren't this bad!
6 - Shark
I'll have what bhw is smoking, thankyouverymuch.
7 - bhw
Omigod, and I'll have whatever the peep artist is smoking! See comment #4. The guy is nuts!
8 - JR
But how do you account for all the variations in the peep family?
It's like those moths in England - the explosion in color due to marketing has changed the environment and over several generations peeps have adapted to blend in.
9 - duane
We barbecued some chicken breasts out on the patio this past Saturday. Upon flipping one of the breasts, through the smoke and sizzle of burning chiken fat, I was stunned to see the likeness of Clifton Webb charred into the skin. I'm pretty sure he was in a movie about an angel, so there is no question about the significance of this miracle, not to mention the financial potential. I put a sign on my front door, but nobody wanted to fork over money to see it --- the cheap bastards. I would have photographed it and put it on the web to amaze you all, but one of the cats found it up on the countertop, and, well...there you go --- damn meddlesome cat. I could have made a fortune.
10 - Chris Kent
Some people are terrified by clowns. Others are afraid of heights. For me, it's Clifton Webb. Thanks Duane for sharing your story. I will now have to call my therapist.....
11 - HW Saxton Jr.
I once found a Bar-B-Que potato chip in
the perfect likeness of Billy Gibbons of
ZZ Top.I washed it down with a real cold
bottle of Shiner Boch.
12 - bhw
The potato chip reminds me that a few weeks ago, I found a perfectly formed, erect penis Cheetoh.
No lie.
13 - Shark
"...I found a perfectly formed, erect penis Cheetoh."
Damned liberal media.
14 - bhw
It was cheeezay.