Sometimes you see a headline and you say, "I just gotta read this story." Such was the case this morning.
Porn actor sought in slaying dies after falling off cliff
And that's not even the funny part. Check out the lead paragraph:
"A porn actor, who was accused of killing a coworker with a sword, died after falling off a cliff in California on Saturday when police used a stun gun to subdue him."
Right away, the double entendres come rushing to my mind. "Sword?" Are we using euphemisms on CNN?
But no...it was at the scene of an actual porn shoot, where apparently one of the porn actors grabbed a prop sword and killed a fellow porn actor.
According to police, Stephen Clancy Hill used a samurai-style sword to attack three coworkers. One died.
Now, this happened on Tuesday. But the denouement (that's a classy literary word meaning climax, a word which seemed kinda inappropriate considering the subject matter) came Saturday when the cops finally had Hill cornered near a cliff in West Hills. He kept them at bay (no word on what kind of weapon he was using—here's where you're free to use your imagination), but the cops eventually had to use their stun guns on him. (Hey, there's another double entendre!)
That's when he went over the cliff. "Police said Hill jumped, but also added it was unclear what caused his death."
The story is full of rich, rich wordplay that can be read with a snicker in your voice.
"On Tuesday night, West Valley police were called to a home on Hayvenhurst Avenue following reports of an assault with a deadly weapon.
"The home was being used to make pornographic films, but shoots had ended for the day."
See? The filthy jokes write themselves! "Assault with a deadly weapon" at a porn movie set? The "shoots" had ended for the day? Oh, MERCY!
Oh, and if the name doesn't seem familiar: according to the Internet Adult Film Database his porn name was "Steve Driver." The CNN story leaves out a lot of valuable info. For instance, the guy he allegedly killed was fellow porn actor Herbert Wong (aka "Tom Dong.") They starred together in such movie classics as Cuckold Abuse and Femdom Humiliation and Brutal Femdom Cuckolding. In fact, they appeared together on the box cover for both films!
They will be missed.