This is a great defense along the lines of, “Gee officer, I’ve never broken into a house before in over 25 years on this earth. You never caught me before, right? Surely all of this broken glass, a crow bar with my fingerprints on it, and a pillowcase full of jewelry can’t make you think I actually broke into this house tonight!”
And really now, who has ever heard of a candidate for the title of the World’s Fastest Man using a banned substance or substances? That’s just crazy talk.
This scenario is especially bizzare when it involves a World’s Fastest Man who is coached by a guy named Trevor Graham (who coached Marion Jones and Tim Montgomery) – the Disgraced Former World’s Fastest Man – and who was embroiled in the Balco Labs scandal. It was alleged by both Victor Conte and Marion Jones’ ex-husband C.J. Hunter that Graham received and distributed steroids to his athletes.
Oh yeah, one more thing, Graham is the guy who sent the mysterious substance known as “the Clear” to the authorities for testing, thus blowing the whistle on Conte and Company.
And then there’s Mel Gibson, who, after being pulled over for drunk driving in Malibu the other night, went on a tirade and allegedly said the Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. He also uttered the phrase "fucking Jews." There’s no indication, however, that he blamed the Jews for the failed drug tests of Landis and Gatlin.
Unconfirmed at press time were rumors that Gibson has blamed the Jews for his movies, Bird on a Wire, Conspiracy Theory, Lethal Weapon 4, What Women Want, and The Singing Detective.
Mad Mel didn’t claim not to know how the booze got into his system. Nor did he concoct a North By Northwest scenario in which he claimed foreign agents took him to the unoccupied home of a United Nations Diplomat, where they forced him to chug-a-lug massive amounts of spirits, where he then escaped and was caught driving while incoherent and anti-Semitic.
Gibson didn't try to get out of trouble by saying he didn't have too much alcohol in his system, but he just didn't have enough blood, thus throwing off his blood/alcohol level.
Gibson released a statement in which he took responsibility for his actions, and doesn’t seem to blame some innocuous force for his predicament, and he lays off the Jews as well. Here it is.
Article comments
1 - lori
I guess good ol' Mel finally spoke his mind. There's a partial transcript of the police report on this site, in the right-hand column.
2 - Roberta Rosenberg
A better read is found here.
3 - sal m
gee roberta, thanks...i guess you didn't see that i linked to the same thing in the body of the item above...
4 - Roberta Rosenberg
Oops, my bad. I tend to speed-read through the posts and responded to the reply rather than your original post, which I enjoyed immensely.
5 - Elvira Black
A shanda indeed! Very funny!
6 - Mohjho
I have come to the sad conclusion that professional wrestling is the last true sport.
You can’t bet on it, and no one cares if you do drugs.
7 - Craig Borax
great stuff. Floyd made the tour worth watching and I'm still hanging on until he's proven guilty (which sadly seems more likely every day)
8 - Jack
Barring lab error the first time around, the B sample in Floyd's case will probably come back positive. I personally do not believe this proves he doped. The test in question being used is 25 years old, and has been flagged by WADA as notoriously unreliable. There are much better tests these days that use all the sexy new radio-isotope-whatever stuff to differentiate naturally produced testosterone from artificial testoserone. My one hope is that Floyd gets a chance to have his sample tested with these tests by a competent lab.
Note also that this is the same lab that was FOUND to be in violation of all kinds of policies during the Armstrong scandal. If I were Floyd, I would want the WADA to grab that sample as fast they can and get it out of France and into a serious, neutral, modern lab.
All stage winners and race leaders are tested in the Tour de France. Floyd cleared all his other tests. Seems rather odd that Floyd would sit down and go "Let me juice up tonight so I can go grab the stage win tomorrow and then pop in the test so I can ruin not only this Tour, but the rest of my career too."
I want to see the actual ratio and how much it failed by. If it was just over the line and is within a reasonable doubt of this medical condition (hypothyroidism), I say he's innocent. "Unusual" things happen to your body too, when you ride you bicycle 120 miles a day for 3 weeks.
9 - Mim
Of course the tests are unreliable. Just ask any athlete who has been tested positive ha ha! (Scientists won't agree however.)
The people who come out best from all of this are the lawyers who can be guaranteed a good living over the next few years, mounting a defence of the indefensible.
As for hip surgeons - a doctor who can speak so confidently of matters outside his area of expertise is highly suspect IMO. Try getting your own doc to do that - no way will they.
10 - Hairynipples
Happiest man in America right now? Barry Bonds. Smiling like Congressman What-his-name (Condit) after 9/11 and Chandra Levy fell off of the front page. Of course this will die down in a couple of weeks and we can get back onto Barry World. By the way I have seen more clips of him flying out to center this year then all the homeruns he hit. Does time really love a hero? (name the band, man).
11 - sal m
i think time loves a hero was done by rocco and the stingrays....
12 - Hairynipples
Time did not love those guys.
I just got back from France. It was my blood test they used in the Landis case. I think that explains it all now, huh?
13 - lisa davis
before you kids get your panties all in a bunch, you may wanna read up on how the testing is done, and why landis is probably innocent: scienceblogs.com
14 - sal m
nothing in that item suggests that landis is probably guilty...it just muddies the issue with science that may or may not be applicable.
15 - sal m
me wrote:
"nothing in that item suggests that landis is probably guilty...it just muddies the issue with science that may or may not be applicable."
me meant to wrote:
nothing in that item suggests that landis is probably innocent.
16 - Baronius
Is it just me, or does that picture of Mel look just like Saddam Hussein?
17 - lisa davis
"me meant to wrote: nothing in that item suggests that landis is probably innocent."
that's because you flunked reading and comprehension 101!
but then, how can anybody take someone who writes "me meant to wrote" as credible at anything is beyond me!
18 - sal m
gee lisa, thanks for pointing that out...i REALLY had no idea that what i wrote wasn't proper.
since you think that the link you provided in some way exonerates landis, why don't you explain some of the key points for us.
or do you consider the information contained on a blog that is written by a person with the following bio as being the last word on the subject of landis' testosterone ratio?
"Jake Young is a MD/PhD student at Mount Sinai School of Medicine focusing in Neuroscience. He is due to graduate in 2032. He received a BS and a MS in Biological Sciences from Stanford University -- where he spent most of his time drinking heavily and building vegetable catapults instead of learning information that would now be eminently useful. When he is not failing terrifically to perform his sworn duties, he enjoys watching bad movies, ethnic food, and running. Pure Pedantry is a blog about neuroscience, general science, medicine, and scientific culture. It also explores important issues like why Gary Busey continues to get work, and, why -- in a municipality with perhaps 2 million single women -- Jake cannot get a date."
how can anyone who bases their hypothesis on landis' natural test ratio being higher than the norm write, "I have no idea what Landis's historical or recent tests are, but I agree that they need to check that not only was his value high but it hasn't been before. I guess I would speculate that it wasn't or we would have heard about this before. As to whether it would help, your guess is as good as mine. Not being a cyclist, I wouldn't know."
i guess i speculate? yep, this is flawless logic and solid scientific data.
19 - sal m
oh and here's a little more... newyorktimes.com
20 - hapi1
Mel...may very well not be a Bigot
good luck to you, the dixie chicks and the rest of you who think that you are bigger than life. you have been found gulity in the court of public opinion.
good luck
21 - billyjoem
Is it possible that someone unethically put the synthetic testosterone in the food that he consumed, with him unaware? He is very adamant about his innocence. If this is the case, wouldn't it be the fairest thing to disqualify the race. If he did a lie detector test, and the test proved his innocence. It would seem to be the only fair thing to me.
22 - billyjoem
In my last comment on the end, I forgot to include... rather than strip him of his title.