Just after school started again, Eric and I went to the beach for one last perfect day of warm sand and sunshine. We were sitting there, watching a man fish, talking about books, travel, and all the dreams we held for the future. He was going to be a great novelist — the next Louis L'Amour. Me? I was going to get through high school. I wanted to be a great artist. I wanted to see the world.
As we talked, I started to feel flushed. I couldn't figure why, exactly. I just had an eerie calm fall over me. There was a sudden warmth in me that began somewhere in my chest and it began to swell within me. It drove me to my feet and I looked at Eric, smiled, and then began to walk. He jumped to his feet and ran to catch up to me. I felt lighter than air. I was floating down the beach.
I suddenly stopped, looked at him, and said, "I love you." It seemed to bubble up from my toes, through my heart, and out my mouth. I laughed a little and began to float down the beach once more. Yeah. I loved Eric. More than anything else, I knew that. I knew that the warm feeling I had in my heart was him. The warm feeling I had in my head was him, too. That floating sensation I had was him. It was my love for him.
Then, I floated right into fishing line.
I looked at Eric and I laughed. I called up to the man fishing and apologized. He gave a friendly holler of "no problem!"
Eric wrapped his arms around me and told me he loved me too. He'd wanted to tell me for a long time. He was afraid he'd scare me off if he told me. He was waiting to see if I felt the same way.
"I love you, too. I love you. You!" And then he shouted so that everyone on the beach could hear. "I LOVE HER!"
We ended our last perfect day of warm sand and sunshine by starting something new and fresh. Something that carried us through the next 10 months.
We hadn't heard the last from his ex-girlfriend, but we faced her together and told her — together — to get lost. When she told him that a "little girl" couldn't ever give him all the joy in bed that a grown woman could, he laughed and told her that it took more than sex to keep his attention. Eventually she got sick of the game and disappeared. At least we didn't see her lurking around. That was enough for us.
Article comments
1 - -E
Joanie you truly are a treasure to the written word. Thanks for sharing this with the world. I've been raped myself and it never fails to make me teary eyed to hear that someone else has had to deal with it. It happens in all different shapes and sizes and colors and patterns that there is no telling who will say they, too, have survived it. I am glad you had someone you could trust that was so supportive for you in that time.
And I'm slightly jealous. I'm going to be 24 next month and never loved anyone, let alone told them.
2 - Christopher Rose
Fabulous work, Joan.
Thank you.
3 - chantal stone
Joan...what a beautiful story! my heart raced and i had tears in my eyes, reading your heartfelt and honest words. don't leave us hanging....we'll be waiting to hear what happened when Eric came back.
4 - Connie Phillips
Joan,
Thank you for sharing both the horrific and the wonderful. I too hope you decide to share the more about Eric with us.
5 - El Bicho
Very powerful and moving.
6 - sujatha
Lovely, heart wrenching story. Beautiful writing. Yay! for Eric. Hugs.
7 - Scott Butki
Joanie, big hug. This must have been hard to write about but I thank you for sharing it.
Eric sounds like such a good catch. I hope you write about what happens next with him.
8 - Scott Butki
Are you going to write an update or sequel?
I'd love to read it.
9 - Joanie
Scott, I don't know if I'm going to follow up on this one. The rest of it isn't nearly as heartwarming and easy to read.
10 - Scott Butki
Nothing wrong with some negativity.
11 - Will
That was lovely...
12 - poignantisle
After a long time i reaaly felt filled , with your words .. Please write the rest -- Shankar.
13 - rhonz
your story is so interesting, it really cathes my attention and im really touched by it...hope you'll both live happily with each other...
14 - LuLuLzZ
i lulz'd my way through this, best part was when he said he needed more than sex to keep his attention.. LULZZZ my ass dude, i bet he found out he was gay and went to bang his "best friend" in lake tahoa or whatever u said. a dude as emotional as you has to either be gay or on their way... bottom line: SUXXX FOR UUUUU