Feeling guilty for feeling relieved

As Hurricane Dennis begins to make landfall, I am heartsick for the people in its path. Though forecasters repeatedly said the storm would truck right past the Tampa area, I was terrified it would dogleg and veer right into us. Instead, we had tropical storm-type weather all day yesterday and into last night. Yes, we dodged a bullet, but I feel terrible that someone else will take it for us right in the gut.

I've never been attached to a home that I've lived in. I've never felt the connectedness to a house that others seem to have, not even the house I lived in prior to moving to Florida, even though all my children were born in its master bedroom. Since moving into this house, however, all that has changed. I have become very emotionally attached to it and I would be devastated if anything happened to it. It's the first home I've ever genuinely loved, the first house I would be hard-pressed to ever leave. I realize that we are only in the beginning of hurricane season and that anything could happen between now and season's end. For the first time, I can honestly say that if I lost my home, I would be crushed. And I feel awful knowing that, when Dennis finally disintegrates, I'll still have my place...but only at the expense of hundreds (thousands?) who won't.

Edited: bhw

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  • 1 - Tan The Man

    Jul 10, 2005 at 2:58 pm

    There's not one safe place to live on the world. There's always a danger everywhere. For people who live in Florida, the price they pay for no sales tax or good weather is the summer threats of hurricanes. I live in California with almost year round good weather, but I fear earthquakes, although not as much as some people.

  • 2 - Lisa

    Jul 10, 2005 at 3:02 pm

    So true, Tan. I used to live in the Midwest and I'll take hurricanes over tornadoes any day (there's time to get out of the way). I lived farther south in FL last year and the eye of Charley went right over my little island so I know what these folks are going to feel like this time tomorrow. It sucks.

    And earthquakes? Ugh...don't even get me started. lol

  • 3 - TBJ

    Jul 10, 2005 at 3:28 pm

    While I understand that it is your house, the culmination of years of hard work(?), but still, it IS a house and noone should ever risk their life for their material possesions. That is why a lot of people die in these disasters. They'd rather stay home with their TVs, couches, and jewelry than go to a safe place.

    And I should know, up until recently I lived in a very hurricane-prone area and almost 99% of the people who die were because of them being; 1) stupid and curious, or 2) did not want to leave their 57 year old wood house.

    It's a shame really.

  • 4 - gonzo marx

    Jul 10, 2005 at 3:34 pm

    Lisa sez..
    *I'll still have my place...but only at the expense of hundreds (thousands?) who won't.*

    Lisa..feel no guilt..it si NOT at the expense of others...the capricious nature of weather is beholden to no one...

    and where i am gathering you feel guilty that you are safe, let me assure you that the storm does not care one bit who or where it strikes...it's just a storm

    don't anthropomorphize them, they don't like it

    Excelsior!

  • 5 - Lisa

    Jul 10, 2005 at 3:37 pm

    TBJ,
    You're absolutely right. I would never stick around during a hurricane, no matter how much I loved my place. Material possessions aren't worth my life.

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