Who can blame the staff of Facebook for removing any photo of a breastfeeding breast wherein the least bit of nipple and/or areola shows? After all, it’s right there in the U.S. Constitution: neither nipple nor involuntary areola, except as a product of pornography whereof the party shall have been duly aroused, shall exist within view of the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.
We may bear arms, bear our religion, and bear a fifth of whiskey; we may even use bears to block our doors so troops cannot quarter themselves in our house during peacetime; but at no time shall we bare the breast. Specifically we shall not bare the female breast; specifically we shall not bare the breastfeeding breast; specifically we shall not bare the female breastfeeding breast when an infant is in the picture, because most men find it inhibits their arousal.
Think of the mayhem that would ensue if we allowed the female B-word out into the open. Just look at Europe, those threadbare heathens! Their car companies are on the verge of collapse, their currency is weaker than a spent whore, and only the richest have adequate health insurance. Oh wait—that’s America. My bad.
Nonetheless, heretofore and whatnot, breasts are bad. Horrible, disgusting, inhuman even. The male of the species and those females who have never seen their own breasts have rightfully decided in what context a mass of mammary can be displayed -– and it ain’t to feed infants. Seriously, folks, why do you think God gave us formula? Am I right, China?
The sole purpose of the breast is to be augmented, photographed in as unseemly a fashion as possible, airbrushed, placed on pages more glossy than a hooker’s lips, sealed in plastic, confined behind a barrier of particle board on a magazine stand (so children and men under 5’7” can’t reach it), and marked “Adult Reading Material.”
A public show of the breast leaves nothing to the imagination. I know when I see a fully exposed breast on the train or at the playground the only thought running through my mind is “For cryin’ out loud, I might as well be looking right into the labyrinth of the labia.” Sure, it’s true that many people, both men and women, wouldn’t know a vulva from a Volvo; but while some think this is rank ignorance, I think it’s insuring the mystique of the female form.
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Robert M. Barga
All persons agreed to the terms when they signed up. Furthermore, they checked a box confirming that the photo was acceptable. Really, I can not find how they have grounds to bitch
2 - El Bicho
It's their company, so why shouldn't they be able to set the rules as silly as they may be? I don't remember anyone being forced to use facebook nor it being a Constitutional right.
3 - Russell
It is Facebook's policy if you do not agree go elsewhere.
4 - Dr Dreadful
Facebook says they took the action solely based on user complaints.
They didn't say how many complaints.
Two, maybe?
5 - Jaime Anderson
I totally agree with Facebook. I do not want to see women breastfeeding while searching through facebook. The argument that they want to "memorialize a beautiful moment in nature" should be saved for their hard drive and not the general viewing public. It's a personal moment between mother and child. I could argue that having marital relations with my husband, sanctioned by God is a moment I want to preserve in time. Fine - but not for the entire world to see!!! Give it up, it's their website, they can decide what gets deleted. If the moms don't like it, then turn in your facebook account.
6 - Eric Roth
Witty deconstruction of absurd puritanical rules that keep the United States from becoming the enlightened nation our founders envisioned.
Why are Americans in 2009 still more afraid of bare breasts than violent psychopaths?
7 - Robert M. Barga
@Dread, I would complain about that picture, simply because facebook is accessible by anybody over 13, and to me, those images are inappropriate for them
8 - diana hartman
jaime, why are you comparing the act of breastfeeding to the act of sex?
9 - diana hartman
mr. barga, do you seriously not know that many a breastfeeding mother with older children will feed her infant in the presence of those children without cover and that, if called in, no one at social services is going to take issue with that or call it "inappropriate"?
10 - Dr Dreadful
Jaime, you say that feeding is a 'personal moment between mother and child', but I somehow doubt you are offended by this photo.
And if not, why not? After all, it makes no difference to the baby.
And in answer to Robert: I understand perfectly that Facebook is entitled to set its own terms of service, but I am equally entitled to call them silly if I want to.
11 - Robert M. Barga
say you have a chick walking around in a super market without a shirt on, how is that appropriate (I say the same about a guy wALKING around, i bear no sexisim here)
A mother with her children =/= public
12 - diana hartman
mr. barga, are you comparing exhibitionism to breastfeeding an infant?
13 - Matthew T. Sussman
What Bicho said.
Also: we've beaten every other injustice in this world and we're onto the right for women breastfeeding in public? That's fantastic news! I can't wait until men are able to roam Times Square freely jamming medical suppositories into themselves without getting frowned upon.
14 - Robert M. Barga
You are showing a breast, how is it different?
15 - diana hartman
if breastfeeding and exhibitionism are the same in your mind, there's no where else to go with that...at best, that's misguided; at worst, that's just creepy...
16 - Robert M. Barga
I do not see how a breast is appropriate for public in this country.
17 - zingzing
never take your shirt off again, robert.
meh. you must be kidding. look at the happiness to boobs-in-public indices of various countries. you will find that the less pent up you (male, you) are about seeing women's breasts, the happier you are. shit, i'm happy to see them. makes my day.
but a mother feeding her baby in a natural way is not in the least bit sexual and therefore, has little to do with it.
when a doctor gives you the "turn you head and cough" or the greasy thumb, do you also equate that with sexuality?
wait. what country are you in?
18 - Mark Saleski
so is cleavage OK in public?...or should that been banned as well?
cleavage Ok but breastfeeding not?
19 - Matthew T. Sussman
Really, this is all about public vs. private. Nobody is saying "breastfeeding is bad," they're saying "breastfeeding shouldn't be something seen in public." Other natural, non-sexual acts:
• giving birth
• going to the bathroom
• checking for various cancers of the naughty bits
Then there are some non-natural, yet still non-sexual acts involving sex organs, such as circumcision, changing diapers and inserting a tampon, all which are and should be handled away from the public eye.
If pictures of any of those acts would show up on Facebook, I can see them taken down. If any of those acts are done in a public setting, I can see arrests being made. What I can't see, though, is if someone posts a picture of himself pooping, and the picture is removed, I don't envision a collection of pro-excrement activists staging a public poop-in.
20 - Matthew T. Sussman
By the way, next time I notice grown men on the Internet debating the goodness and badness of breasts, it damn well better involve cup size.
21 - Amanda Lee Bittle
There's something I don't understand about the American public breast taboo.
As a woman, I could walk down the street with hardly any covering at all over my breasts. The crucial cover-up spot? My nipples.
But men have nipples. And men walk around sans shirt in public quite often. Yes, I realize that they can't enter a variety of business establishments, but they CAN mow their lawns and walk their dogs.
AND post pictures of these acts on Facebook.
NIPPLES. The very naughtiest part of a woman's breast, the only part that absolutely positively MUST BE COVERED UP. Right there in public! In front of elementary schools! Outside grocery stores! In government-funded parks!
Seems inconsistent, right? The difference between men's and women's "breasts" is the amount of fatty tissue. BUT this is the part that's apparently okay to show (cleavage, teeny tiny bikinis).
22 - Amanda Lee Bittle
Great article, by the way.
23 - Robert M. Barga
Okay, fine, think of it like this
if you breast feed anywhere that needs to follow the health code then it is wrong
the park is fine
24 - zingzing
facebook has no health codes.
25 - Robert M. Barga
Facebook is their own site, they have the right to do it
I think that it is obscene, but our argument on that is fallacious simply because it is an opinion. So I migrated to one only based in evidence, the health code one
Also, at comment 17, I don't take my shirt off in public unless at a forum fitting for it (say a pool or a beach or a locker room)