For years I’ve been a huge fan of bleach. And I mean bleach for everything – I’ll bleach the bathroom clean, the kitchen countertops, the floors, even if they’re wood, my hair, the bathtub, laundry; you name it, I bleach it.
I have used so much bleach that I have actually acquired a weird thing called “chemical pneumonia” which my doctor was astonished to discover in anyone, since this is usually the kind of thing that one only reads about on the back of the Clorox bottle, but Lo! If anyone was going to get it, it would be me, because I am bleach addicted. Oh, say what you want about having bleached my brains out. I can tell you I have the cleanest house around, and now that I’ve gone on a painting spree, I have the smell of fresh paint, all latex and lovely and the house looks like the freakin’ Ritz with its shining wood surfaces and lovely white kitchen countertops and bathroom. No complaints here.
I have also patrolled the aisles of the drugstore, because I am depressed and when I am depressed the drugstore always cheers me up because you can buy shit there that will make your life better, or seemingly better, or make you think it is because it is cleaner and neater and not such a buzzing ball of chaos. So far, I have bought a Clorox toilet cleaner thingy with a special handle so you don’t even have to touch the gross end part, you just click and Whoosh! off it comes and click again to add another sponge.
I’ve bought Crest White Strips (which really do work) and Pearl Drops Whitening (which also work) as well as Crest Whitening Toothpaste Vivid White, which with the Pearl Drops works better. I’ve also bought a jar of Nads hair remover so I can have my white skin hair free, though it’s already pretty hair free because I’m light-complected and blonde (well, grey, but blondish grey now: note that grey is also white, like it ahs been bleached.)
I have in my basket those items, plus a Strawberry Lip Smacker from Bonne Bell, a fade cream from Dr. Palmers to fade away my freckles because I hate that I look Celtic because where I’m from, that makes me Scottish (I am) and a second-class citizen to those higher ups in London, la de da, etc. Not all look upon us this way, but enough, and the only film to capture it well was Trainspotting. Watch it and understand why people in Scotland turn to drugs; what the hell else is there to do. We’re the poor cousin of Britain, yet part of it, no independence, we’ve shed far too much blood, we’re all red haired or blonde and freckled, like we inbred and never mixed up our gene pool, so in a way, we’re all even looking and plain, or at least I am.
Article comments
1 - bhw
Omigod, it's a dessert topping and a floor wax!
I think you like bleach a little too much, though, if you're getting toxic from it.
2 - nashae
this is a useful website. it helped me write a research project.
3 - timothy p.koon
i had read an article about a polio outbreak in minnesota ,then remembered grannytalking about bleach years ago and it's uses. thanks for the enlightenment on the subject. good luck with the other issues also.....
4 - sade
thanks and glad this was helpful. it's amazing how such a surface mundane thing can actually really be so interesting and helpful in so many really critical ways; i wonder what would have happened WITHOUT something like bleach... what a strange concept, but that can be said of so many things (antibiotics, penicillin - pure accident - etc) So much of it is pure chance and whim and caprice. Is that fate or not? sometimes i suppose, but not always. interesting to ponder...
thanks for reading.
s.
5 - julie
Does anyone have information on the Doctor who discover the use of bleach for hospital in old England. The English Doctors were very old school and her was a young doctor. The older EXPERIENCED doctors thought his theory of wash ones hands in a solution of water and bleach was poppycock....even though he had very few deaths in his ward. After years of trying to convince the "Higher Court" this courageous doctor demonstrated on himself..and died two days later.
6 - charlie
y hav u ritten a whole website on the history of bleach? u frek
7 - Angela
I was just diagnosed with chemical pneumonia due to chemotherapy effects. However, I also think the chemicals used around my house to clean it made me more susceptible to this illness. You seem to have a good attitude about it. I wonder if you stopped using the bleach.
8 - jen
its good to have a website on bleach cause you never know what your gonna have to study about
9 - sadi ranson-polizzotti
or maybe it's just a product that didn't exist for a really long time and without it we'd be exposed to all sorts of things that we now take for granted and would be really quite ill from all sorts of diseases and the like (seriously), so i wouldn't underestimate the importantance of it... not saying you are, but to any reader, it is an important product. I didn't know half of this when i researched it, which is exactly why i posted it...
we take a lot of stuff for granted, like bleach, when without it, we'd be a lot worse off...
no joke.
be well... and thanks for the read.
s.r.p.
10 - emily
please stop cussing lamoes. thats not cool. ahahahahahaha
HA.
jkjkjk
ilyyy.
<333
11 - emily
do ye' catch me drift matey?
arg.™
12 - Jim
That was really interesting , thankyou ;) shame it's affected your health , good stuff though , you can learn a lot about history if you open your eyes , trouble is I'm always reading ;)
13 - lily
this is very crappy so do some thing about it now .