Years later, my son and daughter were caught in a similar situation. Their teams were co-ed, and the demon of fairness would once again rear its ugly head. For them it was not the benched team members who would set the stage. It was the teacher himself who decided each player would be given but one word to spell.
Some did spell the words correctly because they had studied. Some didn’t because they hadn’t. In the end there was no final score even though a score had been kept. It was thrown out, much to the chagrin of those who had succeeded. The moral of the story was that everyone was a winner. This, even though not every child knew how to spell.
The education system attended by my children did also see fit to award every child for their efforts at the end of the school year. My ADHD daughter was given “Most Improved,” nine years in a row. At the beginning of every school year, she and her teacher would go ‘round and ‘round until about March. Only then would the teacher give up and follow the suggestions I’d set upon his/her desk on day one. Not miraculously, improvement followed.
My daughter had no use for awards (most ADHD children don’t) and she didn’t suffer when, in high school, they were no longer offered. My son, however, did not take it kindly when, year after elementary year, he was passed up for civic awards in favor of “best artist.” Yes, he could draw very well. He could also, because of his experiences living with his sister, diplomatically negotiate a way out of hell’s worst – for himself or on the behalf of others.
His compassion, his willingness to see the need where others couldn’t, and his ability to say just the right thing at just the right time was unequalled by his peers and lauded by his teachers.
Nonetheless, the rule of fairness thumbed its nose at him. The child who bullied others during school hours, but who sacrificed watching cartoons to pick up trash on the side of the road every Saturday morning, was deemed the more civic-minded and thusly rewarded – not the child who might one day bring about peace in the Middle East.
Article comments
1 - dad
Just another example of how to "dumb down" requirements so that everyone is able to be "equal" to everyone else. It's just another resurgance of the "Great Society" that spawned all the the "Entitlements" of the 60's and 70's. If you have something you "owe" it to the people that don't have that. And don't ask if it is wanted. Someone else will decide for both of you. They probably have something also, but they will keep theirs and share yours.
2 - lori
While I see your point about the foolishness of making the driving test easier, I don't understand your comparison to your math relay race.
From the way you described the story, you displayed less teamwork and camaraderie than the other girls, not the other way around. They wanted a chance to play for their team, and you wanted to be the only one to play just so that you personally could beat the boys. You call that teamwork? I call it ball hogging. What exactly would the other girls have gained if the girls' team won but only one girl actually played? A victory in name only.
When it comes to school and learning, fairness -- everyone gets a turn even if they're not as skilled or smart -- is a much better value to teach children than winning at all costs.
Sister Mabel should have spent more time helping the other girls understand and like math than pitting the boys and girls against each other. Learning isn't something to hoard or wield over others to make them feel inferior. What an unhealthy educational environment!
3 - Ruvy in Jerusalem
Diana,
This was an excellent piece that rightly belonged in the politics section of the magazine. While you are the culture editor, this is a very political piece. Pieces similar to it at Desicritics.org are rightly called political, as the entitlements you talk about in passing that have been turned into legislation in your homeland are called "reservations" there and are the subject of bitter debate.
Needless to say, I agree with you 100% on all the points you make here, even though I suffered from the exact opposite problem. Once upon a time, the folks at the City University had the guts to upgrade their standards, instead of dumbing them down, and I was forced to attend a college in the Bronx, instead of Brooklyn College, as I was originally supposed to. This was done after I had taken the senior tests for matriculation, and after the grades were in, and there was nothing I could do about it. It was unfair, but life is unfair.
4 - Jason
lori, I think that the problem is, academics, like driving is NOT a team sport.
How would you feel if you were graded an 'A' on your paper but received a 'C' because the other person on your team got an 'F', so the teacher took some of your grade and added it to theirs to make things more 'fair'?
I have a serious problem with dumbing things down for equality.
I have a serious problem with lowering standards for equality.