Theyre totally gonna get laid.
Written by Joe Wilson
WASHINGTON D.C. (PoopyCaca.com) As "Star Wars: Episode III — Revenge of the Sith," the final film in George Lucas' prequel trilogy, hits screens and the last of the Star Trek franchises, "Enterprise" airs the final episode, the U.S. Census Bureau projects that the total population of nerds will increase by 30 to 35%.
Over 30,000 nerds from around the world gathered in Indianapolis for the largest official "Star Wars" convention ever held, which is referred to in the U.S. Census Bureau study as "the epicenter of the nerd population explosion."
According to U.S. Census Bureau spokesperson, Walter Hurley, "The number of nerd females has increased over the past twelve years and, although only five females are in attendance at the Star Wars convention, a 400% increase from past conventions, all are expected to reproduce due to their choice of Princess Leia costumes."
Dressed as a storm trooper, Joe Restino, 37, of Bennington, VT, weighed in on the end of his lifes work - being a "Star Wars" fan. "Mr. Lucas says this is the last film and without another one to look forward to and more items for my collectable museum to get, Im thinking maybe its time to focus on the ladies."
Walter Hurley confirmed that the largest contributor to the nerd population boom is the simultaneous end of both "Star Wars" and "Star Trek." Hurley explained, "Without the distraction of these two sci-fi staples, the male nerd population will seek out females who are willing to indulge in, as we say in the census business, pity put outs."