Disneyland Forever

Matt at Scrubbles is an unabashed fan of Disneyland. Matt brings us glad tidings:

Paul Pressler has stepped down as CEO of Disney's theme parks, accepting an offer at the Gap. For those who don't know, Pressler has been a thorn in the collective sides of Disneyland fans for years, making one bad quality-cutting decision after another and trying to make the place into a cheezy, glorified mall outlet. Al Lutz's invaluable Disneyland Information Guide has been covering these developments with a barely containable glee. Scroll down his latest update for some funny advice to Pressler's successor - 10 Things NOT To Do.

1. Don't LIE

When something is supposed to "glow away forever" - it is not supposed to come back as an emergency maneuver to boost sagging attendance at a park you missed the mark on. And you don't sell lightbulb souvenirs that were never used, and don't give extra performances beyond announced closing special events that you've already sold tickets to.

Your customers clearly understand the magical Disney lie - that things never do go away forever, but they come back new, improved and back where they are supposed to belong.

2. Don't MESS WITH THE DISABLED

I still remember the interviews on KNX news radio with developmentally disabled crying children (living on severely restricted incomes no less) lamenting the loss of the Disneyland ticket discounts.

Visualize that famous "Scream" painting if you need a refresher here.

3. Don't PROMISE MORE THAN YOU'LL DELIVER

You don't sell a rehearsal as a premiere - you explain the problems up front, offer refunds or credits and diffuse the situation ahead of time. You also don't keep a show or attraction running that numbs your audience into silence.

We won't discuss the rumors that SuperStar Limo actually decreased rider's IQ scores.

4. Don't PASS OFF MOVIES AS RIDES or TORTILLAS AS ATTRACTIONS

People can sit in a theater at the local multiplex, or nowadays with a big enough TV set make their own home theater. Unless they are Michael Jackson chances are they don't have a home version of Pirates of the Caribbean.

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Article Author: Eric Olsen

Career media professional Eric Olsen is honored to be the founder and publisher of Blogcritics.org, which, quite frankly, rules - as do his wife and four children.

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