If by day you are told that all people are created equal and that you should treat everyone with respect, but by night you are sexually abused by one of the people who are supposed to be nurturing and protecting you, what are you going to believe is reality? Isn't there a good chance that the later will end up predominating?
It has only been in the past year that I have been able to begin to throw off these shackles of the past that have controlled me emotionally. As recently as August of 2005 I was still figuring out behavioural patterns that were the direct result of events that occurred close to forty years ago.
I know enough now to be able to question decisions and reactions if they seem out of proportion to the circumstances that's caused them. I'm confident that I won’t be making decisions that I will live to regret anymore and the judgements I make will be based on the reality of the present, not the conditioning of the past.
Our decision making ability; our capacity to chose between what's right and wrong is what supposedly elevates us above other forms of life. For the survivor of any circumstances that caused an enforced modification of this ability; beginning to reclaim that power is like being freed from slavery. It is the last stage in throwing off the domination of the past and welcoming the glory of an independent future.
To be able to make a decision completely on your own is a gift beyond all others. With it comes great responsibility, but without it we are not truly alive.
Article comments
1 - John Spivey
It's good to come across an intelligent, thoughtful post free of rant and partisanship. I hope your hard won wisdom serves you well.