I have been thinking lately about car crashes. Specifically, I have been pondering car accidents involving me. My truck was rear-ended Tuesday, and I decided it was time to write about this. For the record, I am fine and my truck is fine, which is more than I can say for the car of the guy who caused the accident or the car of the woman he hit, who then hit my truck.
My issues
I have reached two conclusions. The first, that I have come out against car crashes involving me, is no surprise.
But it's the second conclusion - why I don't like them - that has been occupying my thoughts.
No, it's not the obvious, materialistic reason: that I don't want my car damaged. This is not to say I want my truck destroyed. I have been driving my present truck ever since its predecessor, the original Butkimobile, was totaled in a rainstorm shortly after I moved to Arkansas. But no, that’s not my biggest beef with crashes.
And, no, it's not because I might be inconvenienced by a car crash. The first one caused sciatic nerve problems, left me without a working vehicle in a state where I knew nobody, and made me choose a new truck – the present Butkimobile – in a matter of hours. But that is not my biggest objection.
No, my biggest objection involves control. When driving I like to think I am in control of the vehicle. It is a false sense of security and control, but it still exists.
When struck by another vehicle, or when I lose traction in the rain, I lose that sense of control.
When my car slides on the road, be it from snow or rain, I feel that loss of control and fret. I never really thought that I had issues about control and power, but when it comes to driving, I guess I do.
Article comments
1 - Matthew Milam
I think you've developed a healthy fear of the unknown and conquered it. If that's a good answer.
2 - Scott Butki
Yeah that's a good way of looking at it.
3 - A.L. Harper
You can't let fear rule your life. You just have to push past it.
4 - Aaron Fleming
Very interesting.
Might I be audacious enough to mention J.G Ballard's novel Crash? It certainly has a lot to say on the topic of car crashes, as unpleasant as much of it is.
5 - Scott Butki
I put a link to the Crash movie, the one adapted from Ballard's book? I wasn't able to read that book.
Did you read it?
Thanks, A.L. That is true about fear.
6 - Aaron Fleming
Nah, wrong Crash. That's Haggis' race film in your link, David Cronenberg did the adaptation of the Ballard novel. They're very different, one is a lot of common sensical nonsense about race relations, while the other is about people who get their sexual kicks from car crashes.
It's a cool idea, and experimental and provocative, but rather unpleasant - thus with Cronenberg being my favourite director and being a fan of Ballard I care for neither book nor film. Just doesn't click with me, but check them out anyway.
7 - Scott Butki
i put links to both Crash movies - the race relations one and the weird sex one.
I like some of JG Ballard's books. What was the one about a high rise building with class warfare occuring vertically? Fascinating writer.
8 - Aaron Fleming
Ah, ya did indeed man, apologies. Yeah High Rise is a great novel, all about regression to a primitive and instinctual mode of living, good stuff!
9 - Scott Butki
What's your favorite Ballard novel?
10 - Aaron Fleming
Of the ones I have read, which I won't pretend to have been a great deal, The Atrocity Exhibition has to be the one. Mad and surreal, I don't know if you've read it, but I'd recommend it for all those who enjoy the likes of Naked Lunch.
11 - Scott Butki
I skipped that one because I need more of a structure than that one seemed to have.
He has an amazing imagination
12 - Scott Butki
I had one of those moments today where my heart just stopped:
An envelope to me from a district court.
Ok, I thought to myself, what crime did I commit that I don't recall committing? Or is this the worst time ever for a jury summons? Or what?
Turns out it was a subpoena - didn't know they could do those via the u.s. mail - to appear at a trial for the guy who caused this crash.