The wrapper says: Fun! Joy! Warmth, love and happiness! Good times to be had. Put your feet up for the holidays! Be kind to random strangers. Be even kinder to your friends and family. Get in the loving spirit! Celebrate!
The contents reveal themselves as: Stress, Christmas ghosts from the past, being rude to random strangers, being even ruder to shop staff, being viciously territorial and aggressive, letting drinks and fights get out of hand, giving in to road rage, snapping at your family members at every opportunity, smacking your children in public (or completely blanking them out), creating drama from ordinary situations, eating until you're sick, living beyond your means and trying to out-do each other...
I could go on, but I won't. What the HELL is wrong with everybody? It's like the entire Western society bottles up all their crazy for the whole year and lets it out in one, massive act of collective delusion. It's okay to be a TOTAL FUCKING LOON because you'll blend in just fine.
Is that what the modern Christmas is really about? Is it the psychological fart valve in today's society?
Why do we appear to willingly engage in the mass-delusion of The Perfect Christmas Celebration? Not just in terms of increased commercialism, but the whole happy-happy joy-joy marketing of it as such a splendidly jolly time - when in fact, it drives people over the edge in more ways than one.
Wouldn't it be nice to have a real holiday? One where everyone calmed the hell down and spent some time on quiet reflection. And no sprouts.
Article comments
1 - Lisa Hoover
"Wouldn't it be nice to have a real holiday? One where everyone calmed the hell down and spent some time on quiet reflection. And no sprouts."
God, yes, it sure would. I swear half the people I know are ready to implode and the other half are zombies and it's like that every Christmas.
Me? I shop at Amazon, have all the gifts delivered to my house and spend my free time hitting the egg nog. I'm totally relaxed. Dude.
2 - Nukapai
Dear Lisa, Egg nog and Amazon? Not a bad prescription, it has to be said. I might try something along "A good Shiraz and adopted donkeys for everyone" next year. This year, I've buckled under pressure and purchased a whole heap of more traditional presents.