-- Imprudent Adopter
I'll get right to the point - Do you live near a river? Do you own a burlap sack? If the answers are yes, the solution is right in front of you! If not, I assume you can drive. Ever play softball? If the answers are yes, take your cat for a little ride on the open highway late at night. Get up to about 55mph, roll down the window and release the pitch. Throwing a cat out a car window is much like throwing a softball, with one small exception: The softball usually doesn't scream when you throw it. Don't worry about the cat. No matter how they are dropped or thrown, cats always land on their feet. Believe you me, I've done enough research of my own to know this is true.
As an aside, what I found most disturbing about your letter wasn't the cat but your complaints: She is needy. Her screaming in the early morning hours wakes you up. Her inability to learn the basics of litter-box usage or basic grooming, and a tendency to drool. These traits have caused you to hate and neglect your cat - and now you have a baby on the way?
I hate to tell you this, but this baby is going to be like a big hairless cat on steroids. So, to avoid answering your next letter - "Dear Prudence, how do I get rid of a needy baby?" - I'll simply give you the answer now. Get an abortion as soon as possible.
And then stick with houseplants or goldfish until you grow the fuck up.
If the married man you're dating promises he is not seeing anyone else, can you trust him?
Sure, why not? If he promises he's not seeing anyone else, you can trust him completely.
Ironically, that's the same answer I gave to a letter written last week. The one written by the man's wife.
My wonderful daughter will be 17 this fall. She is a good student and a gifted athlete. She is a beautiful girl, although in her words "not a Barbie doll type or a girlie girl." She loves makeup and jewelry and enjoys the admiring stares she receives from boys. She also seems to think she is "bi." We have talked about this, but I'm confused about the subject. The big question is: Should I allow her to have girls sleep over if I suspect that she is attracted to one of them? I am a 53-year-old woman with a fairly open mind, but this is a little over my head. Thank you.