Tom Fuentes, former chair of Orange County’s Republican Party for 20 years and currently a trustee for the South Orange County Community College District, decided to end study-abroad programs to Spain last week, citing the country’s troop withdrawal from Iraq.
“Many of our students in this college, and of its sister college […] fight on the battlefield of Iraq under the flag that is behind us. Spain has abandoned our fighting men and women, withdrawing their support. I see no reason to send the students of our colleges to Spain at this moment in history.”
In addition to his demands regarding the program, which had afforded community college students the opportunity to study Spanish language and culture for fifteen summers, Fuentes also mentioned (off the record) several other activities in which the colleges should discontinue their participation: The screening of any films starring Canadian actors (as their nation didn’t join the coalition), the academic study of Catholicism (due to the Pope’s stance on war in general), and of course the traditional ‘Belgian Waffle Fridays’ in the cafeteria (because most Belgians know French).
Fuentes’ actions were a boon for upstanding Americans everywhere who agree wholeheartedly that knowledge of other cultures — specifically ones that dare to disagree with ours on occasion — is of little importance compared to the unifying force of petty political gestures.
Fuentes did not comment on whether or not he would be changing his name to Tom Sources in the near future.
“Yes, this is Mr. ‘Sources’. I’m going to need some more flags. The six up here just don’t convey the amount of patriotism it requires to withhold life experience from students.”