AmericCo CEO Dick Cheney emerged from hiding today, saw his own shadow but stood his ground and spoke in a small voice not heard since the last campaign (in which he muttered only two words: “big time,” in reference to a reporter’s anus). This time he had talking points, each a Patriot missile that went to the heart of John Kerry’s campaign.
In a speech to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, Cheney accused Kerry of being a classic tax-and-spend Democrat who is “one of the most reliable pro-tax” votes in the Senate, “opposed (to) tax relief as a matter of principle.” He accused Kerry of plotting enormous tax hikes that will punish married couples and children. Young families across America burst into tears at the news.
According to Cheney, Kerry plans to eliminate a number of expiring tax cuts. He then put pencil to paper and showed how Kerry’s arithmetic was off by $1 trillion.
A trillion is a thousand billion. That’s a lot of arithmetic. How could John Kerry be such a little liar?
“It takes little imagination to figure out just how he would fill that tax gap,” explained Cheney, who predicted “a major new tax increase on the workers, entrepreneurs and inventors of this country.”
Even the inventors? You mean that nice old man down the street with the apparatus in his basement? The inventor of the pocket duckhunter?
Yes, even him. Then he dropped the cluster bomb, signaling the finale and causing many in the chamber to gather their blankets and beers and begin the long trek to find their cars. Every burst was another Kerry NO vote on tax relief.
NO to the 10% bracket! NO to cutting the marriage tax penalty! NO to reducing the tax rate on dividend income! NO to expanding the child tax credit!
“All of these ‘no’ votes now form the basis of Senator Kerry’s economic plan,” Cheney lied. “This is the record of a senator who will speak out against higher taxes when it suits the political moment, but is one of the most reliable pro-tax votes in the United States Senate.”
John Kerry, in a stunning betrayal of class, admitted privately that he plans to “stick it” to “the rich,” who he defines as a taxpayer making more than $200,000 per year! You try raising children on that!
Kerry pledged to expand tax breaks for the middle class, or anyone who makes under $200,000. Who’s that going to benefit? Some cab driver who doesn’t even speak English?
John Kerry, whose language is described as “dreadful” by self-respecting Republicans, like when he fell down on his snowboard — a 60 year old man snowboarding! — falls down of course: says, “I don’t fall down” then mutters the F word! (You’ll never find Dick Cheney doing that) — said President Bush’s economic policy had cost Americans 3 million jobs and was driving gasoline prices toward $3 a gallon.
What a little liar that little liar is, not to mention his filthy mouth and his known philandering and alcoholic, first-husband-obsessed wife and his horrible children that he keeps hidden from the press and also his first wife whom he drove crazy with depression until she had to leave him and write a book about it, not about their marriage, but about depression, which the Republican party plans to put on the bestseller lists, even though it’s quite complimentary about John; nobody has to know that.
Kerry accused the Bush campaign of “running a campaign of untruths, of misleading America. They’re running a campaign in March of mid-October desperation.”
Well, that’s just a pile of crap is all that is. Desperate? A tax-and-spend Liberal, that’s right, we’re using the L word, is calling the Republicans desperate?
Ha. We know we are but what are you?