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Buy The World An iPod

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iPods have been created for the convenience of the modern world. That’s what they have been sent here to do. The good folks at Apple, Inc. have struggled over the years to bring functional products to the common man. All hail Steve Jobs.

It can be said that Apple products are the most accessible to humans. Built for the tech-unsavvy, the computers and accessories gleam with clean surfaces and up to date color schemes. The software speaks a common man’s tongue, not the jargon of computer programmers. Who knows what a syntax error is, besides the tech-educated? Apples and Macs are just a good time for the masses.

With the introduction of the iPod, Apple brought music to everyone. An iPod is a tiny digital jukebox, capable of storing all of a listener’s music in one little space. It eliminates CDs, along with the scratches and the skips. A listener can safely carry thousands of songs to enjoy on the bus or anywhere else they wander. The real joy of this magic box is something that technology has fought to bring mankind for years, stress relief. Countless companies have tried to ease the pain of daily life on the workingmen and women of the world. Calgon, a bath bubble tablet that turns your bathtub into a temporary Jacuzzi, coined a phrase that many have parodied over the years.

“Calgon, take me away!” That’s what the iPod is here to do.

With an iPod, a human can ignore the outside world. Less distraction for outside influence brings a state of better being. Think of how much Zen you can get out of peace and quiet during your morning commute. Want to hear birds chirping? Download some onto iTunes, the software that organizes music and is necessary to run an iPod, and seek that bliss. Crazy man on the subway bothering you? Pop in those little, white ear buds and turn up the volume until he is drowned out. The effects can even be reversed. People who live in little Podunk towns can activate a more exciting lifestyle by adding some rock and roll into their quiet lives. Farmers in the Midwest can access the iTunes music store and download the new guitar band of the minute to jam to while they thresh their wheat crops. Excitement is yours with the small white and silver box.

You don’t even have to get a white one. In 2004, Apple introduced colored iPod minis, a smaller version of the full size. They came in pastel shades, but held less music. The trade off was worth it to some. The full size iPod is difficult to exercise with. Besides, smaller, more compact is always better. It leaves more room in a bag for other trinkets, like the new razor cellular telephone.

iPods also cut down on the amount of crap that you have to carry with you. Taking up less space almost pushes those grey hairs back into the temples. It’s like a Botox injection for the soul. The Apple music players eliminate the need to carry anything else besides the unit and some earphones. They even have rechargeable batteries that don’t need changed. When the batteries go bad, you simple throw the unit in the trash and go get another.

Perhaps the best reason for buying the iPod is the fact that it holds so much music. Once you reach the blissful state on mass transit or elsewhere, you won’t have to stop what you are doing every forty minutes or so to change the CD or tape. Simply activate the shuffle function and music will stream for hours. Magic!

Anyone with the dough should run out and get an iPod. Imagine a world where no child is left to listen to the background noise of the inner city and the rural child will have something to draw him to a hipper place of media. Ha HA! The iPod is this magical device!

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About Lunatic Handtricks

  • Amen to that. I bought my first iPod after Christmas and I LOVE it. I even wrote about it on my blog.

    Now it’s taking it’s first cross country trip when I head to Vegas Thursday – it will be my sanity for what is going to be a four hour flight. Thank goodness for the iPod.

  • Mac Mama

    I agree with your article, but I’m curious to know what you think about the cost of the various iPods. Sure, it’s the most amazing thing ever, but maybe it’s still for the upper crust, no?

  • Elizabeth

    what is a razor cellular? do i need to get one of those too?