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Bulletproof Monk inspired me…

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…to watch the two much better movies that it reminded me of. I wasn’t the only one that thought of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. David Edelstein in Slate referred to it as Slouching Dragon. Said that, “The movie means to be Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000) for the American Pie (1999) audience”. Then he makes reference to the ten year-olds near him who were obviously waiting for the sequel to The Matrix. The groundwork was there…

So I sat down to watch Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. This is the perfect movie. The perfect date movie, the perfect guys or gals out movie, the perfect watch-it-alone-on-an-unemployed-tuesday-night movie. It’s got everything. An intricate storyline, real (not just realistic, there is a difference) characters, and a shit ton of action. By jebus, why isn’t Michelle Yeoh in more Western movies? She’s hot, her accent is better than Chow’s, and, hell… I want to see more of her!

I wasn’t planning on it, but then I watched The Matrix. Yes, Colby, we know the philosophy of the movie is anything but deep, but we aren’t inspired to go on a sniping spree, either. It’s another great movie, especially when you have a big teevee and a decent surround system. Also has a love story, but it doesn’t mean so much, you know? When your characters are made from cardboard and acted by such horribles as Keanu Reeves, what do you expect.

But Keanu is perfect for this part. As the Oracle says, “But not so smart.” He’s absolutely perfect for the guy who is the savior of mankind but doesn’t know it. A couple other notes on the film:

1. Did anyone else notice the homage to Vertigo at the beginning? When they are running along the rooftop?

2. I think the helicopter scene was the perfect action moment. Better than anything else, ever. Better than the beginning of Saving Private Ryan, better than anything in Black Hawk Down, better than anything else in this movie. I thought he was going to catch the whole helicopter the first time! And I would have believed it if he had!

3. Couldn’t they have come up with a better line in the subway towards the end, when the Agent refers to Neo as Mr. Anderson, and Neo replies, “My name… is… NEO!” I’ll bet my readers can come up with something better. Hell, a loud, “Fuck… YOU!” would have been better.

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About Matt Moore

  • The Theory

    The first two movies I thought of while watching Bulletproof Monk was Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon and Matrix. Then I also felt some Shanghi Noon, too.

    But, Bulletproof Monk was still a fun way to spend a few hours.


  • Ben

    I would suggest you rent “Hard Boiled”, an early-90’s Chow-Yun Fat/John Woo classic. It’s like a Kung Fu movie with submachine guns and motorcycles. None of Chow’s or Woo’s Hollywood movies have come close to this.

  • Yep, I own Hard Boiled. I love John Woo.

  • John Wilkinson

    Lately, I’ve been seeing the preview comercials for Matrix Reloaded and I get gitty everytime I see it. That movie looks amazing. I can’t wait.