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BTK Regrets “Lame-Ass” Nickname.

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Dennis Rader, the churchgoing family man and Cub Scout leader accused of being the infamous BTK killer, appeared via video link on Tuesday to hear a judge read 10 counts of first-degree murder against him.

After reading the charges, Judge Greg Waller asked Rader if he had anything to say.

“Yes sir, your honor,” answered Rader. “I wish to God I’d never given myself that lame-ass nickname.”

Rader, whose self-inflicted moniker stands for “Bind, Torture, Kill,” went on to complain his nickname sounds like “a goddamned Burger King commercial.”

“What the heck was I thinking?” Rader asked the judge. “BTK? Jesus, why didn’t I just name myself the ‘Puppies and Rainbows’ killer?”

Bob Johnson, Rader’s court-appointed defense attorney, said Rader is despondent over what he believes will be “less-than-respectful” treatment at the hands of other serial killers currently sitting on death row.

“My client wishes he had given himself a ‘meaner’ sounding name,” said Johnson. “He believes the other inmates would have a much harder time ass-raping the ‘Skull-Fucker Killer’ than ‘BTK’.”

When Judge Waller reminded Rader that he had no one to blame but himself for his current predicament, Rader responded, “Yeah, yeah. I know. But I’m crazy, remember?”

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About copygodd

  • http://www.thebmrant.com Matt

    funny!

  • Eric Olsen

    sick, but appropriately so

  • http://copygodd.blogspot.com copygodd

    thx.
    i aim to please.

  • http://paperfrigate.blogspot.com DrPat

    Not that it’s comical at all, but these comments reminded me of Daniel Stern’s character in Home Alone dubbing himself and Joe Peschi the “Wet Bandits”.

  • skullfucker

    He better not steal my nickname. Ill sue!

  • http://www.rodneywelch.blogspot.com/ Rodney Welch

    I wish to God you’d never given us this lame-ass satire.

  • http://dumpsterbust.blogspot.com/ Eric Berlin

    Wet Bandits… now that was funny.

  • http://copygodd.blogspot.com copygodd

    ouch. you wound me, rodney.

  • anonymous browser

    “a goddamned Burger King commercial,” hahahaha. It’s hard to joke about such a twisted motherfucker, but you pulled it off.

  • shawn

    who does he mean when he said skull fucker killer?